Which Oscar Stars Actually Have Style? We'll Never Know.

March 7, 2014, 7:35 am

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It starts to sound like a lightbulb joke: How many people does it take to get a woman dressed for the Oscars? Kidding aside, the answer seems to hover around 10, when you factor in several designers who compete for the honor of custom-making a gown for her, the celebrity stylist who coordinates her whole look, various assistants, a seamstress and an armed guard to stand watch over all the jewels sent over by Harry Winston. Think I'm exaggerating? Check out this Instagram compilation from numerous stars thanking their enormous glam squads. And thanks are in order. If they do their jobs right (as they nearly always do), the star walks into a hotel suite filled with flawlessly curated fashion, chooses from a range of can't-go-wrong options, and then sails out onto the red carpet to coo at Ryan Seacrest, "I picked this one because it just felt like... me."

In truth, we'll never know what her unaided style looks like. What might she have worn in the pre-stylist era? Think back to when Demi Moore came to the Academy Awards in bike shorts and Kim Basinger wore a cross between a gown and a tuxedo (a gotux?). Award show fashion was far less tasteful and much more fun back then. Celebrities got blamed for their style mistakes, but also lauded for their brilliance, as when Sharon Stone (all on her own) paired a white Gap button-down with an evening skirt.

Authentic, individual acts of style like Sharon Stone's are rare on the red carpet these days. If you want to see more of them, grab your coat and hit the street. That's where you'll find stand-out experimentation and joyful self-expression. Street style has always been inspiring, but never more so than now with all the varied sources of cool fashion out there, from H&M to vintage, ebay to Etsy. Real women are taking advantage, killing it every day in outfits they put together on a real budget, to live a real life.

Those women are the style heroes we revere at Redbook, the magazine I put out with a fantastic team of fashion-savvy editors. So this September, we're turning the spotlight on them with our Real Women Style Awards. You can learn more here. I'm already blown away by the torrent of great looks women are submitting. Check out this one, and this and this. If you are wondering if you should be up there with them, showing off your accessorizing chops, great new/vintage mix or the way you channel Sophia Loren/Grace Kelly/Grace Jones? The answer is YES.

Your selfie beats that Oscar selfie any day. So post it here. Jennifer Lawrence, eat your heart out..

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What Does Your Beauty Weigh?

March 10, 2014, 6:41 am

≫ Next: How Coloring My Hair Changed Me As a Person

≪ Previous: Which Oscar Stars Actually Have Style? We'll Never Know.

It's not like a scale of ugly to so-so to gorgeous. To say a woman is ugly based on her appearance means you haven't really looked at her. It's ignorance. Beauty is more than meets the eye. It goes deeper than that. There are layers of beauty. Beauty is body, mind, heart, and soul.

Women's beauty and value weigh too heavily on their looks. Looks shouldn't limit a lady. They shouldn't be labeled by whether a guy considers them gorgeous enough to date. On the other hand, they shouldn't be written off by anyone as just a pretty face and not recognized as a smarty pants too.

I don't even think we're measured by our physical beauty. I think we can decide something else. We can show the world we get to define our beauty. Our beauty is not how long our hair is with extensions of highlighted hair defining our beauty. If you like that, own it, baby. But if you have a shiny bald head, fightin' the good fight for your life... that is beauty.

Your skin may be tucked or pulled, injected with whatever, smeared with expensive goo, or weathered from the sunshine of your days. Your glow is not found in a bottle or procedure for purchase. It's your energy. Work on that. Being comfortable in your own skin is the sexiest thing on the planet. That is beauty.

Eyes that have colored contacts, are surgically lifted, or rimmed with a full set of lashes, are all a personal preference. This does not matter. The wisdom of life, the beauty of the journey you've seen, and the delight they express through you, are what make you beautiful. There is nothing more beautiful than a woman whose eyes light up as her grandchildren bounce their way into a room. (That would be my mom.)

Mouths creased with lines do not define. Whether the lips are full or thin from age, dolled up with colored gloss, they do not tell of beauty like a smile does. How many kisses you've given and received, how many kind words and authentic truths you've spoken, make up true beauty that the lipcolor of the season will never rival. You color your world with you.

Sizing up a woman based on her curves or lack thereof to equate her femininity is of no use. Strong women are truly beautiful. The strength of a woman can be seen in at her home, the hard work of her life, the birthing of babies, the raising of kids, in running a marathon, starting her own business, new career, or a charity, and the triumph of overcoming challenges she's faced. A healthy body is to be celebrated no matter what digits they add up to or squeeze their tush into.

The fire that lives inside of her is where her beauty truly lies. How her beautiful brain has helped her learn so much, how her heart has made her love so much, and her spirit that creates her world and her aura that spreads out to everyone she knows.

Don't ever put a lady in a box, thinking you can make her beauty about aesthetics, cultural standards, or whatever a magazine or media defines as the "thing" now. If she has a look of a certain ethnicity or descent, the exotic nature of how she was created should be celebrated and not erased. A woman's style is not a means to say she is or isn't a beautiful women, it's her choice. It's paramount choosing what is right for her, rather than shrinking herself and morphing into the last fashion, fad, or acceptable chic. A woman who is really herself is beautiful. A beautiful woman is decided through our higher thinking and not through a lens of judgement. Let's cheer for the beautiful women. Let's rise up and teach the younger women that they don't have to be a photoshopped generation that has to hide their flaws, imperfections, or their quirks for that matter. Self-acceptance is the key to loving who you are, on the inside and out.

I stand proudly with my sisters of the world to celebrate you. I'm 5'0 tall and will never have long legs. I'm not Patty Homemaker, but I'm sure I'd like her if I met her. We must celebrate the unique flavor that we each are, which makes this world even grander in its diverse beauty. Plastic robots who say all the right things may make certain people like them, but it wouldn't be living. I'd rather live full. I choose to live an authentic me. Authenticity means you're true to you. You can do what you want in order to enhance your beauty, cause who am I to judge, I love my hair dye to cover the grays. Just don't feel you have to chase a fake picture of a person on a magazine cover that doesn't exist. Open your mind, heart, and spirit up to see beauty differently. See it everywhere. See it in everyone.

What if all women really celebrated the beauty they saw in other women? No competition or comparisons. I choose to every day. I look for the beauty in them and myself. At almost 37, I've never felt more beautiful. It's because I know who I am. I focus on my Spirit first and let who I am radiate outward. I preach self-love because I don't want women to believe their worth comes from outside themselves, fitting in, or an idea/ideal. Just rock what you got, whatever it is.

Make peace with your body. Love your face, crooked nose, thin lips, aged skin, and all. Don't be scared. YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL. (Yes, I'm shouting it from the rooftops for all of us.) You always were and always will be. Now you can move forward happily being you without worrying what your beauty weighs. Take that off the table, stop chasing beauty, the hamster wheel never ends unless you get off of it.

I'm cheering on all you chickadees.

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How Coloring My Hair Changed Me As a Person

March 10, 2014, 7:33 am

≫ Next: The Rise of Contemporary Plus Size Fashion

≪ Previous: What Does Your Beauty Weigh?

If you knew me 10 years ago, you would not recognize me today. For most of my life I had long dark brown hair but over the past few years it has been blonde, blue, ombre, and black.

I didn't used to be this adventurous. Growing up, I always wanted to be blonde but when I shared my desire with others I was met with total disapproval. "NO! Don't do it. It would look terrible on you!" Or, "I could NEVER see you as a blonde," which was fair because I have olive skin and dark eyebrows.

Hairdressers shared more reasons why I shouldn't do it: being blonde is a lot of upkeep. The color would damage my hair. It would take hours and several appointments to achieve the color I wanted. If I wanted a change, why not go darker instead? That would look better and really bring out my eyes.

It seemed the whole world was against me being blonde, so I gave in and stayed a natural brunette. Every time that little voice inside me whispered "But I want to be blonde!" I would tell it to go away -- this was the best I was going to look so I needed to stay this way.

Fast forward and at age 24 I found myself sitting in the hairdresser's chair, ready to make a drastic change.

There were many factors that contributed to this change of heart. I had been through a lot (heart ache, graduating school, living in a new city) and did some self-exploration. With distance from the girl I used to be, I had space to figure out who I really was and what I really wanted -- and I wanted to be blonde.

Sherri Belanger, my longtime hairdresser, played with my hair as we looked at my reflection in the mirror.

"I can tell," she said. "You're ready."

I was. I was ready to risk the tears and self-loathing that comes with a bad haircut, not to mention an entirely new look. I had no clue what I'd look like blonde but I was ready to trust the little voice inside me and finally go for it, even if it made no sense to anyone else.

(Side note: I'm forever grateful to Sherri for spearheading my transformation. She truly listened to me and never tried to dissuade me from what I wanted.)

I was at the salon for 6 hours. Because I had virgin hair, it could handle a lot of chemicals. We didn't know how blonde we could get it in one sitting, but I ended up a very beautiful, light colored hue. After my hair was blown out, Sherri and I once again stared at my reflection in her mirror.

"Wow," she said. I shifted my head from one side to the other, marveling at my new locks.

The next few days I kept walking past mirrors and feeling completely shocked. Who was I? My dog didn't recognize me when I picked him up from daycare. I was taking night classes and during roll call, professors did a double take. When I flew home for the holidays a few weeks later, my father couldn't find me at the airport.

Most surprisingly, this decision to go blonde opened up a floodgate inside me. I had wanted to be blonde, no one thought it was a good idea, I did it anyway (which took a lot of courage), and I liked the result. Instead of telling my heart, "Sorry you can't have what you want," I was sending a new message to the body: "You can have what you want and you can trust that little voice."

Over the next few months, I realized other things I wanted, other things I had feared: I wanted to quit graduate school. I wanted to start a business. I wanted to move to a different part of the city. As I began pursuing these dreams, in spite of my fears, I felt lighter, happier, more empowered, and free.

Now, years later, I am back to brunette, but it's a different type of brunette: shoulder length and almost black-colored. I've had many different hair colors and people have started telling me, "You change your hair every time I see you!"

If I wake up tomorrow and want to be blonde again, I'll go to the salon and make the change. The nice thing about hair is that it grows back and if you don't like it you can fix it. But because of this experience, there is a new fearlessness inside of me, an energy which has spilled over into all areas of my life.

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The Rise of Contemporary Plus Size Fashion

March 10, 2014, 10:04 am

≫ Next: St. Patrick's Day: 10 Reasons Redheads Are The Luckiest of Them All

≪ Previous: How Coloring My Hair Changed Me As a Person

Contemporary plus size fashion -- a segment within the plus size fashion industry that is quickly on the rise and I am here for it. And I am not alone here in the excitement. But, as plus size designers give it to us, there has been a bit of pushback with pricing and a few other details that needed to be clarified and shared, explaining just what Contemporary fashion is... and how it contributes to the Rise of Contemporary Plus Size Fashion...

Why Contemporary Plus Size Fashion?

Well, ask yourself this... "Where does a fashion forward plus size woman shop when she wants more from the mall chains and fast fashion but isn't ready to break the bank on high-end designer wear?"

She Rocks Contemporary.
This has been a long time coming -- ever since I started my blog, The Curvy Fashionista, while working for a department store in my former life. There were plenty of moments where I would stroll theses brand's sections wishing that it was carried in more sizes, my size. But while I have the retail background, I realize most do not and with the growth of the plus size fashion industry, it is now needed to break things down a bit to help you along your shopping journey...

In between bridge and better fashion, lies Contemporary Fashion. It is more than just a price range that separates this segment, although it plays a HUGE part of this classification. Contemporary fashion also appeals to a specific lifestyle customer. Fits are more body conscious. Hemlines short, but not too short. Mid to lower rises are apparent. The choice of fabrics and textures are bolder, less muted. Statements are made here. Prices are a bit higher than the mass chains and mass retailers. These pieces last quite a while and over many seasons in this category.

BUT, this is only emerging now in plus size fashion, and I feel that it is important for us to learn a bit more about this segment to better help us shop and maneuver through things. While we may know these departments as Juniors and Bridge, Contemporary fashion appeals to both, acting as a unique gateway into higher end labels.

THE RISE OF CONTEMPORARY PLUS SIZE FASHION
In this NY Times article contemporary fashion is broken down: "In the 1970′s a new category, "contemporary," came into being. "It was for the junior growing up who didn't feel comfortable in neither junior clothes nor her mother's clothes," explains Kalman Ruttenstein, senior vice president for fashion direction at Bloomingdales."

So in this, you will find that there are designers and retailers who do not appeal to you, whom you do not like, or that are too expensive for your liking... this is okay. THIS is normal; this is the normal growth of the fashion industry -- options, segmentation, and choice.

As I was researching this, to bring a well-rounded reference post to you, I found this great read over on ehow. On classifying contemporary fashion, eHow shares "In general, the contemporary price point is significantly lower than a luxury brand price point. This doesn't, however, mean that contemporary brands are too terribly affordable for the average gal. Contemporary pieces run, on average, somewhere between $150 to $800 depending on the item. While these prices are still high, they're much less expensive than luxury brands, which can run upwards of $4000 to $5000 depending on the product."

So when you see the likes of Monif C, Jibri, Rachel Pally, CarmaKoma, and even now, the new Eloquii giving us trends, fashion, and styling at different levels of prices that we may not normally have been accustomed to, know that this is normal and sits right there with the DVF's, Marc by Marc Jacobs, Tracy Reese's, Rebecca Minkoff's, BCBG's and various other designers that we salivate over -- In the Contemporary Plus Size Segment.

This doesn't mean that one segment is better than the other; it means that as the industry grows and starts giving us the fashion we covet so will the options and the ranges of fashion, price, quality, and accessibility.

Unless it is a hero piece that I know will sell out, I won't buy it at retail (blame this on my 13 years in retail), so I stalk my favorite sample sale sites to score a great deal! I shop sale. I mix my big box store purchases with my scores from various designers to create my own style and look...

If you love fast fashion, great! I do too! I do love mixing high/low pieces together. But it is important to understand that change is happening and as we ask for more and get it, we must be able to recognize what is happening, what to expect, and where to get it!

If you wish to know more about this, I wrote a fun hefty piece, Understanding the New Plus Size Segments!

What do you think? Does this help you out? Does this shed a bit of light on everything for you? Let's talk about it.

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St. Patrick's Day: 10 Reasons Redheads Are The Luckiest of Them All

March 10, 2014, 10:46 am

≫ Next: 2014 Academy Awards Gift Lounges

≪ Previous: The Rise of Contemporary Plus Size Fashion

St. Patrick's Day festivities kick off this weekend and cities across the globe dress themselves in green to celebrate the fun holiday. In a way, it's a redhead holiday, since being a redhead is strongly associated with the Irish; even though most Irish are dark haired with brown/blue eyes! Soon, we'll begin to see t-shirts and pins with "Luck of the Irish" stamped over them. Some many not believe in "luck," but many say it's lucky to rub your hand on a redhead's head because the color is so rare.

This year, whether they're true or not, we decided to embrace the many myths of St. Patrick's Day and it's association with redheads. Why not?! We're pretty awesome and lucky to be blessed with red hair.

Here are 10 ways redheads are Go N-Eiri An T-Adh Leat ('Lucky' in Gaelic-Irish):

1. With over 7 billion people in this world, it is very easy to blend in and not be noticed. Luckily for redheads, we stand out in every crowd!

2. A long time rumor has suggested that redheads are going extinct. Luckily for redheads, that is in fact a myth. We aren't going anywhere.

3. With so many beauty and fashion websites there, how do you choose? Redheads do not have the typical skin or coloring, and finding advice can take hours! Luckily for redheads, there is HowtobeaRedhead.com.

4. Brown, black, blonde hair accessories seem to crowd the beauty aisles. Luckily for redheads, there are now redhead bobby pins, hair ties and bun makers on the market!

5. Luckily for redheads, we can blame our outrages on our "fiery tempers."

6. Redheads, do you ever spot another redhead on the street? Luckily for us, you automatically smile at each other and feel like it's a secret club.

7. Luckily for redheads, you don't have to go overboard with accessories and colors. Your hair stands out on its own.

8. Many think having pale skin and freckles isn't "cool." But, for women who take care of their skin and apply sunscreen, redheads always seem to look the youngest! In Ireland, it's very popular to apply Vitamin E oil directly on the skin. It's reported to be a natural anti-aging vitamin.

9. What other hair color can say they have a beauty/fashion tour designed for them? Only redheads! How to Be a Redhead will soon be presenting the live, red carpet Rock it like a Redhead Beauty Tour.

10. Let's be honest, redheads are the coolest. We make up only two percent of the world's population, and being super unique is definitely something to be proud of... whether you're lucky or not.

Photo Credit Ⓒ How to be a Redhead, Kara Kochalko Photography

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2014 Academy Awards Gift Lounges

March 10, 2014, 12:17 pm

≫ Next: Confession: I'm a Shopping Bag Addict

≪ Previous: St. Patrick's Day: 10 Reasons Redheads Are The Luckiest of Them All

The week leading up to the Academy Awards are not only filled with studio parties, gown fittings and practicing winning speeches in front of the mirror. There are also superficial indulgences, like going to gifting suites where attending celebs and nominees get to pick up goodies that range from free trips, clothes, beauty products, electronic gadgets and more.

Despite the rainy weather, which had some suites reconfiguring their set-ups, stars did turn out to peruse the wares, pose for photographs with vendors and take home some fun items. Below is a sampling:

GBK's LUXURY GIFT LOUNGE IN HONOR OF THE 2014 ACADEMY AWARD NOMINEES & PRESENTERS at the rooftop of the L'Ermitage Hotel in Beverly Hills:

Kelsey Scott of 12 Years a Slave at GBK

Tervis tumblers handed out an array of their insulated drinkware that keeps cold drinks cold and hot drinks hot. The company also designed a special tumbler in honor of the Oscars. CamiWraps gave out their stylish bra pockets that attach to any bra. Its hidden zipper in the back holds everything from cell phones to credit cards enabling the wearer to go purseless.

On the healthy side, Activz gave out food powders ranging from beets to kale to carrots that retain 100 per cent of their nutrition and flavor or the original produce. Peet's Coffee and Tea and Magnolia bakery teamed on handing out tote goodie bags with Peet's coffee, Magnolia cupcakes, whole bean Peet's coffee, $25 Peet's gift card and more.

Other products include smoke-free but flavorful e-Hookah by BLOW, brow care kits from UK's HD Brows, Newman's Own Wines, laser hair removal gift certificates by Obagi Skin Health Institute, Sleep-In Rollers that flatten like a sponge for overnight wearing that won't disturb your sleep. There were iPhone cases made out of luxury wood by Alto Collective and hand painted glassware by Wine Me?

Pets were not ignored as well. Support Ur Pet provided custom pet gifts included pearly and beaded dog leashes, over-the shoulder dog tote bags with a light up pocket that converts to a mini pet bed.

DISTINCTIVE ASSETS' ANNUAL "EVERYONE WINS" NOMINEE GIFT BAG for non-winning Oscar nominees worth over $85,000:

All those who were nominated for an Academy Award but did not win do not go home empty handed. Distinctive Assets is making sure everyone goes home a winner. Every recipient of the bag will see Freekibble.com making a 10,000 meal donation to a shelter of the celebrity's choice using with Ellen DeGeneres' pet food, Halo Spot's Stew. Inside the bag were items such as Chocolatine's wine-infused chocolates and a gift certificate for a three-day railway journey on the Rocky Mountaineer train from Seattle, WA to Vancouver, BC to Banff, Alberta.

Other goodies included Swiss-made Slow Watches, luxury shoes by Max, leather handbags from Jitseu, knife-set for shellfish eating by R. Murphy Knives, as well as various gift certificates for stays in Las Vegas, Japan, Hawaii.

SPIRIT AWARD GIFT LOUNGE backstage at The 2014 Independent Spirit Awards in Santa Monica:

John Waters with a DJI Phantom 2 Vision flying camera backstage at the Indie Spirit gift lounge.

Nominees, presenters and talent stop by the On 3 Productions' produced lounge where they received a year supply of Breyers Gelato Indulgences along with a subscription membership for streaming movies and TV shows. (Breyers also made a charitable donation on behalf of every talent that visited the lounge).

Cool electronics included DJI Phantom 2 Vision flying cameras and the TiVO Roamio Plus with lifetime product service. On the fashion front there, New Balance gave out their latest cushioned running called the Fresh Foam 980 while undergarment company Fashion Forms had a limited edition crystal embellished line.

On the food and beverage side there was wine by Dark Horse and dips and spreads by Sabra Dipping Co. To work it all off, Crunch gave out 1-year gym memberships.

TMG BEAUTY AND STYLE DESTINATION PRE-OSCAR LUXURY SUITE at the Beverly Hilton Hotel:

A mini-salon within the suite had hairstyling by Surface Haircare, facials by Sevique Skincare, brow threading by S.H.A.P.E.S. brow bar, sunless tanning by Cocoa Brown Tan. All made sure visitors left with their products to take home.

Ingesol Luxury Time Pieces handed out both men and women's watches and Life N Soul gave out headphones. Rockabye Mommy, a concierge service for moms-to-be handed out Kitson goodie bags filled with baby products from the trendy store while a masseuse specializing in pre-natal massage was also on hand.

Rounderbum, a seamless shapewear company for men and woman that lifts and supports the derriere, showcased several products including underwear that's padded in the back for women and padded in the front for men). They also had undergarment sleeve shirts that not only compress the tummy and reduce love handles, but also straighten and correct back posture.

KARI FEINSTEIN'S OSCAR STYLE LOUNGE at the Andaz West Hollywood:

Kristin Chenoweth with Crystal Light Liquid at Kari Feinstein's lounge.

Red Carpet Manicure had on-site manicures and gave out at-home LED gel manicure systems. JB Lashes not only did eyelash extensions at the suite but also gave celebs their own packs to take home.

Modere, a just-launched company of lifestyle essentials was handing out care packs of some of their products, which including haircare, skincare, liquid dietary supplements, hunger controlling chews and dark chocolate with Omega 3s.

Other goodies included under garments from MeUndies.com, flavored liquid water drops from Crystal Light Liquid and trips to Mulia Resort in Bali.

STYLE & BEAUTY SUITE at Avalon Hollywood hosted by Wounded Warrior Project and produced by Amy Malin's True Heart Events:

This suite included spa treatments by Spa del Rey from The Ritz-Carlton Marina del Rey. For men, there a grooming lounge by SheaMoisure offered up classic shaves. Female guests got to pick clothes from iiJin's clothing line while those with kids received the Tag Along Teddy, a lightweight backback with a removable teddy bear.

Bkr gifted eco-chic glass bottles with removable silicone sleeves, Dreamfoams handed out slippers including colorful sequined booties. PackIt had lunchbags and cooler totes with freezable gels to that keeps food fresh for up to 10 hours.

DORIS BERGMAN'S 6TH ANNUAL VALENTINE ROMANCE OSCAR STYLE LOUNGE & PARTY at the Fig & Olive Restaurant in West Hollywood:

Courtney B. Vance and Angela Bassett with jeweler Silvan K Designs at Doris Bergman's lounge.

Items included Guess? watches and dresses by Single Dress. There was faith-inspired jewelry from My Saint My Hero including the Benedictine Blessing Bracelet with it's medal of St. Benedict and the Benedictine Cross.

Ooh La Bra was handing out bra straps that are designed to be seen as they are designed for fashion, not just function. Various styles of straps included beads, chains, pearls, crystals, leather and others, all attachable to any strapless or convertible bra. The company also showcased it's sterling silver with 2 karat diamond bra strap, part of it's high-end precious metal collection.

Kitt Shapiro, daughter of legendary entertainer Eartha Kitt, gifted soy candles from her Simply Eartha lifestyle brand. Whitening Lightening not only handed out it's teeth whitening, brow kits and lip glosses, but also debuted its BB Plus illumination crème from Gerard Cosmetics.

2014 WOW! CREATIONS LIFESTYLE GIFTING SUITE DURING ACADEMY AWARD WEEK at the Luxe Hotel:

Accessories included Radar Watches, while Zummer Sports gifted accessories like drawstring bags and duffel bags made out of actual sports ball materials including basketball, tennis ball, soccer ball, and others. Bubba Glove gave out cheer gloves - wearable gloves that are also pompoms - in the color of your favorite sports teams.
There were candles from Vance Family Soy Candles in flavors like vanilla caramel and espresso truffle. Dogs got their own jars of peanut butter - aka Puppa Nutter - from Nutty Canine.

On the beauty front, there were supplements by Vibrant Health and GliSODin, My Body Skincare and gift certificates for facials at Dr. Kathy Gohar's Beverly Hills Cosmetic and Laser Center.

DEBBIE DURKIN'S 7TH ANNUAL ECO OSCARS LUXURY LOUNGE at Circa 55 Restaurant at The Beverly Hilton Hotel:

Goodies included argan oil hair and skin products from L'arganium, make-up by MK Collaborative, skincare by BeautiControl, manicures by Polish Bar, holistic dog food and treats from Canine Caviar.

There was also 7 Eye by Panoptx eyewear including its airsheild series featuring a 100% seal made from a foam material that's resistant to perspiration, making it ideal for skiing, water sports or off-roading activities.

ROGER NEAL STYLE HOLLYWOOD BEAUTY & COUTURE SUITE CELEBRATING THE 86TH ACADEMY AWARDS at the Luxe Hotel in Beverly Hills:

Melanie Griffith at RNSH's suite.

At the suite, the company unveiled the Gris Gris Factory Bracelet for male nominees to wear on the red carpet in memory of Paul Walker with RNSH making a donation to the late actor's charity Reach Out WorldWide.

Chocolatier Niagara's Honeymoon handed out true-to-size chocolate Oscars for nominees and Drunken Cake Pops gave out liquor filled cape books in flavors like Lemon Drop Martini. Medea Vodka gave out bottles of their premium spirit that comes in a programmable LED message bottle that displays up to 255 characters.

On the beauty side, there were massages by Cheyenne's Mobile Massage Beverly Hills and manicures by Shelly Hill.

KATHY DULIAKAS' 6 ANNUAL CELEBRITY OSCAR SUITE AND PARTY at the Taglyan Complex in Hollywood:

Wearable goodies included dresses by Single Dress, Pret a Porter designs and inspirational shirts from Wear Luck with slogans such as "I Pray." Accessories included rainforest inspired creations by Maleku Jewelry and chic evening handbags from Bam Bags that are made out of one continuous zipper.

On the beauty side, Le Jolie Medi Spa gave out gift certificates to experience multiple treatments including an LED "DreamSpa" session and radio-frequency skin-tightening treatment for hands. The indulgence continued with shower heads from Aroma Sense that come with an aroma scenting a vitamin c gel filter for a luxurious showering experience.
There were bath and skin products from Zensation, Herban Body Care and Kama Sutra, while haircare included shampoo by Yuki Sharoni and flat irons from Iso Professional.

Low-cal SkinnyGirl cocktail introduced SkinnyGril sparklers - non-alcoholic flavored sparkling water and SkinnyGirl On-the-Go high fiber bars.

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Confession: I'm a Shopping Bag Addict

March 10, 2014, 2:49 pm

≫ Next: The Best of Both Worlds: Texas A&M International University

≪ Previous: 2014 Academy Awards Gift Lounges

A few weeks ago, an old friend arrived at my front door with a hostess gift in hand. Over the years, we have given each other enough trinkets to fill a small room, and I reminded her that we should put an end to this tradition -- that is, until I saw the bag she was holding. I was not so concerned with the contents as I was with the shopping bag itself.

It was perfect -- small to medium in size, cream-colored, made of thick paper with a cardboard bottom and sturdy red ribbon handles. The store's name was displayed in a subtle way -- not at all prominent. I immediately knew that this shopping bag would serve me well on numerous occasions. Perhaps I'd transport cookies to my children's school, wine out to a dinner party or maybe even a change of shoes on a snowy day. The possibilities seemed endless.

I can admit it: I am obsessed with shopping bags, and I am not alone. I know of women across the country that seek out good shopping bags as I do, and they hoard them too. If you don't believe me, take a peek in the backs of their closets. You'll find collections that resemble mine.

My shopping bag collection is well organized, and that is because all of the good bags are folded up and put into the queen bee of all bags -- the large and very sturdy one that holds the entire collection. Without this very important bag, the rest of the bags are simply a mess on the bottom of the floor.

As it stands now, my queen bee bag is an oversized J. Crew one, and it has held up nicely for the last few months. My children and husband know not to grab that bag when they reach in the closet for something in which to carry their projects or changes of clothes. I taught them well, just like my mother did. I knew better than to grab the oversized Bendel's bag from her closet floor when I needed a bag. Even if my other options were not of the right size, I had to make them work.

When I think back on certain friendships, I can see how they evolved through the use of shopping bags. I knew that I was becoming close with one friend when she dropped off hand-me-downs from her daughter in a plastic Rite Aid bag. I hugged her in the parking lot of our children's school, finally knowing that she was no longer trying to impress me, and that I would find a use for even the Rite Aid plastic bag.

The first few years of hand-m- downs from the new friend came in glossy bags from Ann Taylor, Banana Republic and even Neiman Marcus. Slowly, items were left at my door packaged more casually in Gap and Old Navy bags, and at long last, we had made it down to the drug store bags.

Every shopping bag has its time and its place, even the drug store ones. The next time you make a purchase at a store -- any store-- take a minute to appreciate the free gift you have been given, and think about how you want to use this bag. Perhaps no one use will come to mind instantly, and that is OK. Whatever you do, do not throw it out. Put it in the back of your closet like my mother always did and rest assured, its time will come.

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The Best of Both Worlds: Texas A&M International University

March 11, 2014, 7:55 am

≫ Next: 'The Bachelor' Finale Revealed The Real Winners (And Losers) Of Juan Pablo's Season

≪ Previous: Confession: I'm a Shopping Bag Addict

Situated at a mere 18.1 miles from the Mexican border, the signature flair of Texas A & M International University (TAMIU) can be classified as a culmination of the different cultures that surround its quaint campus. Located in the heart of Laredo, Texas, the university, which is part of the A & M system, serves as the cultural and intellectual hub for the over 7,000 local and international students that compose the student body.

While Texas is usually known for its immense pride and over-the-top hairstyling, as we reach the southern part of the state, such clichés become a distant memory. As the border is only a short car ride away, TAMIU students often find themselves in the center of a 'culture clash.' In other words, rather than having distinct cultural attributes, Laredo is composed of a mixture of both Mexican and American customs. This blending of cultures is unique to the university and is reflected in nearly every aspect of the student body. From speaking Spanglish, savoring the traditional street foods of Mexico and donning bejeweled cowboy boots, it's safe to say that TAMIU students truly enjoy the best of both worlds.

In terms of everyday styling, the weather of the South Texas region has always presented a notoriously bi-polar challenge; one day it may be a frigid 40 degrees and the next it'll be a breezy and perfect 75. With such drastic weather changes, TAMIU students must constantly be on alert in terms of their wardrobe choices. But despite these inconstancies, Laredoans are known for getting some serious mileage out of their closets.

Strolling through the lush grounds of TAMIU, countless masterfully distressed cut-offs, cute sundresses and chic flatform sandals will most likely catch one's attention. This distinct blending of high and low fashion is yet another result of this bicultural mecca. Derived partly from the minimalistic, sartorial worthy stylings of the citizens of central Mexico and partly from the glamorous allure of urban Texans, the personal style of a typical TAMIU student falls somewhere between the two. The day-to-day ensemble of a Laredoan focuses on creating a balance between the two extremes, meaning one can most likely spot a Fashionista/o mastering the art of minimalism with a twist: the addition of a statement piece.

This Fashionista manages to embody just that, as well as the typical essence of a TAMIU student. Operator of a local fashion blog, as well as a rising sophomore, Alexandra Vela's simple, yet eclectic look is indicative of her personal style as she always likes to "break free from the mold." Living in a somewhat traditional border town, asserting yourself through wardrobe choices is the easiest way to make your mark. Despite the confused looks she may receive upon occasion, Vela proudly proclaims her personal style as falling somewhere between "effortless chic, edgy and minimalistic."

Such effortless cool is reflected in her spin on casual attire. While articles such as sweatpants are usually said to be reserved for lazing around, Vela's pairing of relaxed loungewear with classic leather pieces amplifies the staple to an entirely different level. Her sheer top lends an avant garde air to her ensemble; while her platform cut-out boots are the signature focal point of her look. Vela's mastering of casual cool embodies the everyday stylings in Dustdevil country, bringing forth the unexpected and putting new spins on the most unlikely of garments.

Caught between two vastly differing worlds, the students of TAMIU choose to shape their own preferences and create a culture all their own, rather than merely joining the crowd. With influences from a variety of different places, the community's personal style is then a mixture of all that has come before them, leaving it to be difficult to strictly define. As the intricacies of this cultural hearth truly can't be found anywhere else, its diverse, expressive and unique student body are no exception.

Allison Ramirez is a junior studying English and Communications at Texas A & M International University. Aside from interning for CollegeFashionista, Allison also operates her personal style blog, The Stylish Soul: www.thestylishsoul.com. In addition to her immense love for fashion, she is a self-professed foodie and enjoys spending her days testing out the latest street food with her beloved dogs. Upon graduation, she hopes to relocate to New York City and pursue her dream of working in the fashion industry.

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'The Bachelor' Finale Revealed The Real Winners (And Losers) Of Juan Pablo's Season

March 11, 2014, 8:37 am

≫ Next: The Too-Fast, Too-Soon Flytrap

≪ Previous: The Best of Both Worlds: Texas A&M International University

Today we can finally bid farewell to Juan Pablo, all-around a**hat and widely-regarded "worst Bachelor ever."

After seeing "El Bachelor" go on an "aventura" for 2.5 months, all the while digging himself a slut-shaming hole bigger than the Grand Canyon, viewers got to watch in horror/relief as Juan Pablo got subtly insulted by his family members, nearly got dumped by Clare, wooed Clare back in order to dump her, and chose Nikki as the woman he would not like to marry (but would totally fake date for Us Weekly cover purposes). While this season of "The Bachelor" has already deftly exposed the show's weird sex issues and some uncomfortable dating truths, last night's episode gave us some insight into who the real winners -- and losers -- of the season are.

WINNERS

Chris Harrison
After seasons of being primarily relegated to saying "this is the final rose," this finale was host Chris Harrison's time to shine. Here is a quick sampling of Chris' flagrant contempt for Juan Pablo:
--"So... no regrets?"
--"I don't know what I'm looking at."
--"I'm gonna say congratulations. I think that's the right thing to say in this situation."
--"Shower that one off?"
--"Well, another season of 'The Bachelor' has come to an end. Not gonna lie, I'm OK moving on."

Oh, Chris. I think we all are.

Andi Dorfman
After being smart enough to dump Juan Pablo before he had the chance to dump her -- and epically telling him off for being a generally sh*tty date in the process -- Andi was rewarded with a whole lot of audience goodwill and the "The Bachelor" franchise's biggest prize: the chance to star in her own season of "The Bachelorette" and find someone to get engaged to for a couple of months. Here's hoping we get to see her grilling her guys on their political views and religious convictions.

Clare Crawley, Sharleen Joynt, Kelly Travis And Every Other Woman Who Juan Pabs Didn't Pick
"I would never want my children having a father like you," said Clare as she left Juan Pablo in St. Lucia. Bullets? Consider yourselves dodged.

LOSERS

Nikki Ferrell
Don't worry, Nikki. There is a very simple way to move yourself out of this category -- dump Juan Pabs. He may not be willing to say he loves you, but somehow I suspect you're not that into him either. (And you get bonus points for pushing back on Chris Harrison's insistence that saying "I love you" in front of a live studio audience means anything about the substance of a relationship.)

Juan Pablo
"Ay yay yay," Juan Pablo. What a "journey" it's been. He ended his adventure with no fiancé, few fans and, perhaps most tragically in his eyes, no "Dancing With The Stars" contract. Maybe the yellow M&M will still have him.

WINNERS/LOSERS

The Viewers
As anyone who has been sucked into "The Bachelor" web of poorly-conceived metaphors, utter ruin of the word "journey" and faux love knows, watching the reality show week after week is a truly masochistic experience. But somehow, watching a repulsive bachelor like Juan Pablo made for far more interesting television. We collectively realized that there was something more satisfying about watching the female contestants become self-aware and direct their frustrations toward a sexist prick than waste time cutting each other down.

But after 10 weeks of Juan Pablo's homophobic comments, tweets making fun of mentally-impaired people and general douchery to women, "Bachelor" viewers could only take so much of his reality. We're ready for a little fun. So bring it on, Andi Dorfman. We know your gun-toting, gang-prosecuting, no-longer-ombré-haired self can deliver.

The Best Tweets About "The Bachelor" Finale...

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The Too-Fast, Too-Soon Flytrap

March 11, 2014, 9:29 am

≫ Next: How Much Should You Spend On a Bra?

≪ Previous: 'The Bachelor' Finale Revealed The Real Winners (And Losers) Of Juan Pablo's Season

A friend of mine fell in love. She declared it to the world through numerous romantic quotes and pictures she posted of her new boyfriend on Facebook. Their selfies show a couple beaming on day trips, hiking trails, and hammocks. The photographs, "likes" on each other's everything, and "in a relationship" status are all too familiar. After knowing each other for a cool 11 days, my friend and her beau are happily stuck in the "too-fast, too-soon flytrap."

I've spent some time in the flytrap. I've willingly jumped into that hypnotic, sticky mess on more occasions than I can count and more recently than I'd like to admit. It just feels so good to get stuck in there.

The trap breeds an insta-relationship where two people are immediately and comfortably eating French fries and watching Workaholics on a Wednesday night. They text 73 times in between visits, and the words "I love you" slip out sooner than the first accidental fart.

The poison in the flytrap also makes otherwise rational adults woozy and willing to A). believe this person they've known for 48 hours could definitely be a soulmate and B). forget that they are not a teenager anymore and don't know this new human at all.

So why not take it slow, and do it the mature way? Because it's easier to swan dive in and start pretending, I guess. Maybe leaping into the flytrap helps us avoid the vulnerable conversations that come when you authentically look each other in the face and speak the truth at a careful pace.

When people move into Flytrap-ville after two dates, they declare a Fantasyland-like commitment. For some, this feels like the other person is already invested and won't care about baggage and past mistakes. The flytrap fast-forwards us into a false sense of the good stuff that's attained through gradual exploration into communion with another.

The problem is, when we commit too fast, we don't give the potential union enough time to develop the trust it will need to survive the meatballs people bring into relationships.

I'm not only referring to hairy life stories; I'm talking about inevitable shortcomings like: quick tempers, and character defects that haven't been addressed or dealt with, that propensity to throw guilt, inability to take any responsibility for past relationship catastrophes, and passive-aggressive sneak attacks that are all hiding in boxes under the bed.

When our less-than-charming characteristics do appear (and they will), it's hard for some trap participants to handle them with reasonable empathy. Since we falsely believe our new companion walks on water, imperfections sting like hot coals in our hands. In the flytrap, reality is flipped upside down. We aren't truthfully getting to know each other because we're too busy tap-dancing to a beat we think the other person wants to hear.

On the other hand, trap life can cause one occupant to consider endorsing aspects of their partner that are totally against his or her own core beliefs. People tend to be so loved-up in the trap, they forget to set limits and articulate non-negotiable needs.

In the trap, people sometimes lose their sense of self and buy into the idea that they suddenly need someone to tell them what to do, think, and feel. God forbid that inevitable moment comes when one member realizes they haven't paid bills or spent time with anyone else in weeks. Requests for space usually result in fits of rage and panic. Want for separation is a direct threat to flytrap sanctity. We don't love authentically here; we take hostages.

In my experience, the flytrap keeps us safe for about a month, before we are forced to unstick ourselves and get real. The worst thing about the flytrap is it usually disintegrates in one of two ways: with a fierce and abrupt, "Fuck you, I'm outta here," or, after a grueling relationship where two people practically killed themselves trying to change another person who wasn't right for them in the first place.

If you've rolled around in the flytrap, you understand this alternate universe I speak of. Just remember, it's not all their fault. The trap simply can't thrive without the efforts of two willing and equally hypnotized inhabitants.

In The Mastery of Love, Don Miguel Ruiz writes about a pizza kitchen as a metaphor for self-love. He tells the story of a person making, eating, and sharing all types of glorious pizza in their happy kitchen.

Then, someone shows up and says, "I'll give you this other pizza if you let me control your life." If the person were starving, they'd grab that pizza out of desperation. If, on the other hand, their kitchen (a full life) was bursting with pizza (healthy relationships, self-love, a support system, self-esteem), there's no way they'd need to take another pizza from the controlling pizza negotiator.

The stronger we get, and the more we fill our lives with love, joy, and positive actions, the less I feel we'll barrel into flytraps. Trust in our path and worth should ground us in knowing the slow-build can and will yield everything we desire, eventually. We just need to first be patient enough to walk mindfully through the initial awkwardness of dating.

God bless my friend and the 11-day Facebook courtship. Hey, occasionally the too-fast, too-soon thing turns into a great relationship. I've seen it happen. It just hasn't ever worked for me, and honestly, I'd rather take my time baking some Chicago-style pepperoni with a side of ranch, here on earth.

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How Much Should You Spend On a Bra?

March 11, 2014, 11:39 am

≫ Next: Organizing Your Beauty Booty

≪ Previous: The Too-Fast, Too-Soon Flytrap

How much should you spend on a bra? That's a hard number to nail down, since bra prices seem to be all over the place.

You can get a push-up molded cup at Walmart for under $10. Victoria's Secret sells a similar style for $48. Buy from a luxury lingerie brand like La Perla, and you might pay over $200. But does the higher price reflect greater quality? What goes into the price of a bra? What should women look for when buying lingerie?

I sat down with Ellen Lewis, industry expert and founder of Lingerie Briefs, to get some answers to these questions. With over 30 years in the intimate apparel industry, Ellen knows everything there is to know about lingerie manufacturing and retailing. As a bra wearer, she also understands the challenge of finding the best fit, style, and support for your money.

"Women need to take the same approach to buying bras as they do to buying shoes," Ellen said. "How many pairs of shoes do you own? We wear different shoes for different things. Sometimes we can afford something more glamorous. If we're on a budget, we'll shop at a shoe outlet." We try on what looks and feels best on our feet. Ellen believes, "The most important thing is how it makes you feel about yourself and your body."

Just like shoes, not all bras are created equal. Ellen points to five things women should consider when judging the price of a bra:

1) Labor costs. Manufacturing costs are lower when companies pay cheaper wages, like those found in many third world countries. Handmade items from Europe or the U.S. add to the price tag. Check labels for country of origin.

2) Number of components. Multiple laces, hooks, sliders, elastic, and wires, all drive up the price of a bra. The smaller number of pieces (few or no hooks, non-adjustable straps, wire-free) translates into lower overall costs. Add up the number of parts, including stitches, to get a sense of how much work has gone into a bra.

3) Construction. It can take up to 18 months to create and test a new bra design. Different resources are needed for "cut & sewn" versus molded cup bra styles (watch this video about the process). Bras can be made up of a few or over 50 different pieces. These individual items must all be dyed to match the same bra color. A bra style engineered to fit a B cup is often altered to support a G cup.

4) Cost of fabric and accessories. Larger lingerie brands buy in bulk and can meet the "minimum" purchase orders set by lace and fabric manufacturers (often 10,000 yards). Bras made by smaller lingerie brands are more expensive because they don't have the same buying power as these world-wide corporations.

5) Mark-up. It's tough to figure out the actual wholesale price of a garment as mark-ups can range from 50 percent to 75 percent. Even if a lingerie brand gets a great deal on labor, laces, elastic, and other pieces, there's no guarantee this discount will be passed on to consumers.

But back to Ellen's shoe analogy. We wouldn't buy a pair without trying them on first. They might pinch our toes, dig into our heels, or just look all wrong on our feet. Sometimes we buy a style to match a specific outfit, knowing we won't wear them much. We try on tons of shoes to get a sense of the qualities we prefer. Most of us have favorite brands. Why not treat lingerie the same way?

Ellen added that lingerie companies focus on different aspects of the business. Some choose to put more time and money into advertising and marketing; others concentrate on research and development; some make training and education a priority -- whether through bra fittings or enhanced customer service.

You may want to consider where a bra brand spends the bulk of their money when deciding how much you're willing to pay for their bras.

What about you? Do you stick to a budget when bra shopping? How many styles do you own? Does Ellen's advice change the way you'll look at bra buying?

This article first appeared on The Breast Life.

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Organizing Your Beauty Booty

March 11, 2014, 11:58 am

≫ Next: Weekly Roundup of eBay Vintage Clothing Finds

≪ Previous: How Much Should You Spend On a Bra?

By Korinne Kubena Belock, Home Organizational Expert and Owner of Urban Simplicity for GalTime.com

Organizing those beauty products is the perfect time to let your personal style shine. Have fun with it!

But first, keep in mind there are two main basics. The first is to organize products that you use often in the most accessible place in your medicine cabinet, bathroom drawers or other dressing area.

The second way to organize beauty products is by type. This works particularly well for items you use on a weekly or monthly basis, instead of products you use daily. This also works well for items that you have in excess like body lotions and makeup.

Consider these ten creative ways to get your beauty products organized.

1. Makeup packaging is so pretty that I like to use it as décor -- as long as it's organized. Keep similar items together, and then arrange the most regularly used items on decorative trays and bowls.

2. Store excess make-up in one bin so that you can replenish as needed and keep surfaces from looking cluttered.

3. Organize makeup brushes in pretty small vases or pencil cups to add a bit of style to your dressing area. This works whether you're storing them in a medicine cabinet or on a countertop.

4. Skincare products like moisturizers, serums, and other creams should first be organized by what you use daily, then by type. Items you use daily should be kept front and center. These products also fit perfectly on medicine cabinet shelves because the bottles tend to be compact.

5. If you don't have a medicine cabinet, organize skincare products in clear, stackable, plastic bins that can be stored under your bathroom sink.

6. Corral those bulky styling tools like hairdryers, curling irons, and straighteners with hooks. Command Hooks are perfect because they won't damage any surface. Stick the hook to the back of a cabinet door, wrap the cord, and you're done.

7. When organizing beauty products, use bins that can be easily wiped down or even put in the dishwasher, as a leaky bottle of lotion can be a pain to clean.

8. Recycle small gift boxes or even shot glasses to organize smaller items like tweezers, nail clippers, bobby pins, and safety pins in a narrow medicine cabinet.

9. Use the back of the cabinet doors as an extra storage area. Add magnetic strips from Three by Three Seattle, MagnaPods from The Container Store, or simple Command Hooks to keep items you need at hand, including travel size toiletries, extra three-ounce containers, Ziploc bags, and toiletry bags.

More from GalTime:

Five Common Organizing Don'ts

Eco-Friendly Tips for Cleaning Your Home and Life

Creative Storage on a Dime

Are You Doing Your Laundry Wrong?

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Weekly Roundup of eBay Vintage Clothing Finds

March 11, 2014, 12:40 pm

≫ Next: The Value of Dressing Your "Today Body"

≪ Previous: Organizing Your Beauty Booty

No time to page through thousands of eBay listings? Then just sneak a peek at my weekly eBay roundup of top vintage clothing finds.

This eclectic mix of designer and non-designer vintage clothing and accessories caught my discerning eye because of its uniqueness, contemporary feel and highly collectible nature.

As always, buyer beware! Be sure to read the listings closely and contact the sellers with any questions.

This week's selection includes items by Norma Kamali, Rudi Gernreich, Pauline Trigere, Marimekko and Lanvin. Be sure not to miss the Edwardian lace capelet, the massive YSL cuff bracelet, the Lucille de Paris alligator handbag, the 1950s beaded sweater and the 1920s flapper dress.

GET READY, GET SET, BID!!!
(Click on Pic for More Info and Auction Links)

Which item is your favorite? Leave me a comment below to let me know.

To receive the eBay Roundup of Vintage Clothing Finds via email, along with exclusive BONUS Roundups, sign up for Zuburbia's mailing list here. Your information will never be sold or shared and you can easily unsubscribe at any time.

DISCLOSURE: Editorial selections are made by Zuburbia with no direct promotional consideration from the featured eBay sellers however Zuburbia may receive revenue as an affiliate member of the eBay Partner Network.

PLEASE NOTE that Zuburbia does not endorse the use of fur, feathers, leather or animal skins in fashion. Any of these selections are offered only as more thoughtful and eco-friendly alternatives for contemporary fashionistas who have not yet eliminated animal products from their wardrobes or for collectors who are seeking to preserve these items.

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The Value of Dressing Your "Today Body"

March 11, 2014, 3:32 pm

≫ Next: A Conversation With Style Maven India Hicks

≪ Previous: Weekly Roundup of eBay Vintage Clothing Finds

Let's say I have a girlfriend who has been unhappy with her body for ... well, for as long as I've known her. She is one of the most naturally beautiful women I've ever known, and her generous, open, loving personality just serves to amplify the startling physical beauty that shines out from her silky hair, ladylike hands, creamy skin, perfect-pout lips and dive-into-me eyes.

But she battles her body, and loses.

Constantly.

She adjusts her food intake, and then adjusts it some more. She tries meal schedules and diets and avoidance of certain foods. She counts calories. She exercises twice as much as me and twice as hard. She varies her workout routine, and monitors her heart rate to optimize her efforts, and pushes herself to her physical limits.

And she stays the same shape and size, and she stays unhappy. And while it doesn't matter a whit to me if she gains weight steadily for the rest of her natural days, it drives her insane with frustration. And seeing that hurts my heart.

My girl constantly compliments me on my taste and style while simultaneously lamenting her own unsatisfying wardrobe. I've offered to shop with her countless times, but she always declines, saying she doesn't want to invest in new clothes until she's in a better place with her body. And for a while, I understood that. I've been there. I've shopped for a transitional body and been frustrated when I had to cast off newish duds after just a few wearings because they no longer fit. But recently, I began to push harder and encourage her to get some outfits into rotation that work for her right now, at this weight and in this shape. And here's why:

Even if she finally hits on the magic combination of diet and exercise that allows her to shrink, why should she feel uncomfortable, uninspired and unhappy with her appearance in the meantime? Wouldn't it be possible to bring in a few key pieces -- just a few -- to make the rest of her wardrobe more flattering, functional, and fun? And what if she doesn't change her waist size for another year or more? For five years? For ten? Will it have been worth it to feel frumpy and grumpy that whole time?

My weight and body configuration have shifted more times than I can count. (Or anyway more times than I can recount without boring you all into a stupor.) And the most important lesson I've learned from all those body shifts is this: Dressing for your "today body" is a positive, empowering and a beneficial practice. Buying too-small clothes that you plan to fit into "someday" is ill-advised and seldom serves as the motivator you hope it will be. Wearing shoddily made or ancient or stopgap clothes until you've reached a different or better physical place just makes you impatient and uneasy while you're working toward your goal. Dressing for a body you no longer have or don't yet have encourages you to live in the past or future, and keeps you from enjoying the present.

If your clothes do not fit the woman you are right now, maybe you should get rid of them and get some different ones.

Note that I did not say "new" ones. I recognize that anyone in the throes of a physical transition won't want to max out her credit card on items that might be worn just once or twice. Exploring thrift, vintage, swap and hand-me-down options for these purposes is a fantastic way to keep yourself looking and feeling great -- even in transition -- on a budget. Don't get new, get different.

I believe that part of learning to love yourself is learning to see yourself. And that means seeing yourself as you are right now, not as you hope to be in six months or as you used to be six months ago. And that can be so hard: Facing down the numbers on the scale, or the sizes on a rack of skirts at the Gap, or even just the mirror. The emotional effort it takes to see ourselves in our "today bodies" can be tremendously draining, I know.

But there is real benefit to be gleaned from dressing your transitional body well. Looking good now can get you hooked on looking good: It can establish a habitual desire to feel awesome when confronted with a mirror, and can even fuel style and body-related goals. Even if your body is changing shape, you are likely to maintain the same basic proportions: The process of learning to dress your transitional body will provide knowledge about your figure that will carry over even if you shift again someday. But more than any of that, dressing in a way that flatters your figure right now will make you feel good RIGHT NOW. And you deserve that.

So what are you waiting for? Why are you dressing for a body you don't have, and neglecting the beautiful one you've already got? Start dressing for your "today body," and worry about your "tomorrow body" ... well, tomorrow.

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A Conversation With Style Maven India Hicks

March 11, 2014, 11:40 pm

≫ Next: Secret Diet Destroyers: The 11 Reasons You're Not Losing Weight

≪ Previous: The Value of Dressing Your "Today Body"

Who wouldn't want to be invited to India Hick's slice of paradise in the Bahamas? Just look at her Instagram feed and you'd be begging for a golden ticket to her world replete with hammocks, yoga on the beach and as in the case last Christmas, a dinner for 70 people under the stars and palm trees. But don't let the island life mislead you into thinking that India's life is all about R&R because as India says, she may "live near the beach, but I don't want to lie on it." She is constantly producing collections for her jewelry, bedding and decor lines. She also has a bath and beauty collection with Crabtree & Evelyn. She's written books, does royal commentary on television and runs a boutique.

Below, India talks about her unique name, family life and her idea of happiness.

When I wake up... I look to see who I've just slept with. Could be David (Flint Wood), a dachshund or a child.

Before I go to bed... I start making lists for tomorrow.

A well-dressed man... is incredibly sexy.

Women should always... remain independent.

Men should never... tell you you're the oldest women they have ever slept with. As David did the other day. What a rotter.

The best thing that's been said to me... "I want to stay with you." My foster son told me, after his mother died.

The biggest misconception about me... is that my parents were a couple of hippie's who dreamt up the name India during some kind of acid flashback.

If I weren't doing what I'm doing today... I'd be very, very bored. I may live near the beach. I don't want to lie on it.

My legacy... I could not claim to have one. My grandparents were Viceroy and Vicerene of India by my age. I've got to get a move on.

A great idea... is almost always an impossible one.

Botox is... conflicting.

My mother... is the center of my life. Engaging, enchanting, and witty she has had a uniquely vantage window onto many important moments of the middle of the last century.

The soundtrack of my life... Happy Birthday To You. I have five children. It always seems to be someone's flipping birthday.

The future... is always bright, as long as my family are happy healthy and safe.

Happiness... a big old bag of licorice.

There's a time and place for... internet shopping, and its not late at night. The last time I shopped after midnight two sets of sofas turned up instead of two sets of covers.

There is too much... dog s**t in our garden.

In the end... we are simply dust.

All photos with permission from India Hicks.

Read more from me on Style Intel.

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Secret Diet Destroyers: The 11 Reasons You're Not Losing Weight

March 12, 2014, 5:16 am

≫ Next: 3 Lies And 1 Truth About Why You're Really Still Single

≪ Previous: A Conversation With Style Maven India Hicks

By Yelena Shuster, Glamour

Think you're a master dieter? These common weight-loss mistakes can ruin even the most disciplined action plan (and you might not even be aware you're making them). If you're eating healthy and working out and wondering why you're still not at your goal weight, these common diet destroyers could be to blame.

More from Glamour:
13 Sneaky Habits That Can Cause Acne
10 Most Wearable Spring 2014 Fashion Trends
5 Things You Should Probably Not Say on a First Date
10 Beauty Tricks That Make Guys Melt

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3 Lies And 1 Truth About Why You're Really Still Single

March 12, 2014, 6:25 am

≫ Next: Being Open to Change, Going Short and Switching Color Line

≪ Previous: Secret Diet Destroyers: The 11 Reasons You're Not Losing Weight

"I just watched Sleepless in Seattle and cried through the whole entire thing," my mom confessed on the phone last Sunday night. I knew where this was going, and it always leaves me feeling both better and worse.

"I just want you to find someone so badly -- you're such a wonderful person, you deserve someone really special..." she said.

"I know mom, I do too," I sighed. Somehow, knowing that she's as frustrated as I am brings me an odd sense of comfort. Like at least someone notices and shares my pain.

But then my dad got on the phone. And in true man-fashion, tried to "fix" the problem.

"You have to put yourself OUT there more, Susan. You'll never meet anyone if you don't make it a priority."

I think I went from 0 to 60 faster than my Z3 pulls out of a gas station on a New Jersey highway.

"That's so insulting!" I screamed into my speakerphone. "What am I supposed to do? It's not like I've purposely turned down dates with amazing men to 'focus' on my career. Or with any men, for that matter. I just haven't met him yet!"

I felt badly, because I know the suggestion came from his desire to see me happy, if not also to finally have the grandchildren he understandably longs for. Three kids and nearly 50 years of marriage later, my parents' only grandbabies are my cats: Peanut and Pumpkin.

But honestly, suggesting that the reason I'm still single is because I'm doing something wrong is perhaps one of the worst things you can say to me. I suspect I'm not alone in that sentiment. Mostly because it's hard enough to spend every Thanksgiving, wedding and family function as the eternal third wheel -- we single women really don't need anyone suggesting that it's our fault. We do that enough on our own, thank you very much.

There are lots of reasons us singles are "still" single -- ranging from "because I want to be" to "I'm a raving sociopath." But after a tremendous amount of thought, I have come to the conclusion that for most of us somewhere in the middle, the explanations are pure BS.

3 Lies about still being single:

1. There are no good men/women left.
While it's easy to blame yet another Saturday night home with Rover and an NCIS binge-athon on the apparent lack of great options, it's just not true. And I don't care where you live or how old you are. Statistics show that an estimated 107 million Americans aren't married. That's a lot of single people!

According to Dr. Justin R. Garcia, a CTRD Research Fellow with The Kinsey Institute for Research in Sex, Gender and Reproduction at Indiana University, at any given time, nearly one-third of the adult U.S. population is single. And there is a constant turnover of people going into and coming out of relationships at all times. So maybe it's true what my mom always said, that my husband is still married to his first wife. Or hooking up with someone.

I truly believe we see what we expect to see in life. Are there lying men and women out there, just trying to get into your pants or wallet? Absolutely. But there are also a whole bunch of nice alternatives that are looking for you. Believe it to see it.

2. You're too picky.
Here's the thing about this one: I don't think anyone really chooses who they fall for. You can tell yourself that you need a guy who is six feet tall, devastatingly handsome and drives a Porsche all you want. Then one day, you find yourself head over heels for the 5'8" balding but oh-so-charming bartender at your favorite restaurant. Think Charlotte and Harry in "Sex and the City." You can't help it -- it just happens.

When I was 25, I had a huge crush on the adorable, Jewish restaurant manager where I waited tables. He was a shameless flirt and I was a welcome participant. So when the older, Mexican sous chef suggested we go out sometime, I was less than enthused. I remember begrudgingly following him up the escalator on our first date thinking, "What am I doing...?" But later that night, after a surprisingly fun night of dancing, I was making out with him on the hood of his car. Four years later, he proposed in front of both our families. We called the wedding off at the last minute, but I don't regret a thing.

I've also made the mistake of sleeping with amazing men that didn't quite do it for me. There's nothing worse than knowing you've hurt someone you care about. Just don't do it. Chemistry is a wonderful and unpredictable thing, and you can't fight it or fake it. Regardless of what does or doesn't sound good on paper.

3. You haven't made it a priority.
This is the doozy. The one that makes my blood boil. Love is the one thing you can't "make a priority" and check off your to-do list. If it were, I'd be in Greenwich right now, curled up on the couch in front of the fire with my sexy architect husband and our adorable fraternal twins. Not sitting alone at the bar writing about being single.

There is nothing I cannot accomplish if I set my mind to it. Overcome an eating disorder, check. Move to NYC, check. Get my first job in advertising at a global agency, check. Compete in ballroom dancing, volunteer, become a creative director, write a blog for Huffington Post? All within my control. But love -- love is not.

Notice I said love, not just get married or have kids. I have the audacity to want real love, great love. Or nothing at all. Which leads me to the real reason you're still single:

And finally...

The Truth about still being single:

A real connection is beyond rare. And if you know (or even just long for) what that feels like, it's impossible to settle for less.

I believe that I was blessed and cursed to have discovered love at a young age. Something I was reminded of this Christmas as I spent an evening digging through boxes in my parents' basement. Down there, amongst my Alpha Phi paddles and Singer sewing machine were boxes -- each with a boy's name on them: Andrew, Noah, Nino and yes, the sous chef -- Luis. Note to parents: Never underestimate the reality of young love.

Each box was filled with momentos of love and desire: love letters, breakup letters, pressed roses and fading photos of romantic dinners. All reminders of what it feels like to feel something for another human being. Which is why to this day, if I don't feel something for a guy, I can't even kiss him. No matter how wonderful he might be. My mom and I share this trait. Along with long eyelashes, a love for knitting and the bad habit of picking our cuticles, we both have an "on" or "off" switch when it comes to men. The last adorable and talented guy I dated was amazing: smart, cute, funny and passionate about the earth and animals. We had so much in common... and I felt nothing. Which totally sucked. But as a wise, drunk woman once told me at Blondie's Sportsbar, "Honey, you gotta wanna kiss him." And sadly, I did not.

All I'm saying is, finding real love is hard enough without the voices within and without that make it worse. It happens when it's meant to happen. I actually think that maybe I just skipped my first marriage because I knew what I didn't want. There should really be an award or something for that. At least somewhere to register for presents.

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Being Open to Change, Going Short and Switching Color Line

March 12, 2014, 6:56 am

≫ Next: Seven Menswear Brands Showcase Collections for Women and Trans* Customers

≪ Previous: 3 Lies And 1 Truth About Why You're Really Still Single

For more than two decades, I used a color line in my salon that I really liked so much. I wasn't just comfortable with the products, I was confident in the way they mixed, the application, the process and, of course, the outcome -- consistent quality that I could count on.

I suppose that my satisfaction was linked in part to my familiarity with the line, and my clients were never dissatisfied. I was reluctant to try something new. Then I did. I'm ecstatic. And this column is about change.

Let me step back a few months. The decision I made to switch color lines closely followed another change -- I cut my hair short. Very short.

I loved long hair, but the familiarity, in this case, became a rut. I was just feeling kind of frumpy with what had become an everyday look. I felt like I needed a big change. So, last May I went short, and I love it. It's great. It's fun. I feel younger, not just because of the edgy, contemporary style but because it is a change.

I had another motivation for making a switch: my clients. Some of them had talked about changing their "hair life" -- a term coined by friend and fitness model Torrie Wilson -- "hair life" is a perfect description for the greater aura encompassed by our hair, and my clients wanted to change their hair life. Some of them, however, were afraid of just that - "change," like I was. Cutting my hair was a way to point to the confidence they had inside.

The results were stunning. Not only did everyone support my decision to go short, but several clients finally took the leap they'd been pondering and changed their hair, and several stylists in the salon where I do hair three times a week went short, too!

Originally, I went very short and platinum blonde, with the sides and back shaved pretty close. It was very liberating for me to go with a dramatic cut. And having changed once, I realized that I could, and should, change again. I soon went with more natural colors and a softer edge, and I change the shape frequently now, often subtly.

The bigger change, really, was switching hair color lines for my clients. Another friend and colleague, Robert Edick, has been talking about this product for a few years but it wasn't available in the United States until recently. He found it while training in Europe. Even knowing how great this product is, though, changing was oddly challenging. Now, though, I could not be happier. The improved quality of my work is distinct. The results have given me new confidence.

Like so many stylists, I am devoted to my clients, and maybe that contributed to my reluctance. As the saying goes, "if it's not broken, don't fix it." My clients have been happy for years. And why would I take a risk with those smiles, that beautiful expression of warmth and satisfaction on their faces. I live for that. But we owe our clients more than consistency. We need to provide them with the latest and best developments in the art. That requires us to pursue continued education, to review and refine our skills, to look for the best that our industry has to offer.

I know how difficult it can be to attend a class or research the latest products online when you have a business to manage and kids to carpool across all creation, but this is so important. You must find ways of upping your game and pushing the boundaries of what you know. The task may be tedious but you'll probably feel more confident and energized, the education will make you more valuable, and it's what your clients deserve. Be open to change!

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Seven Menswear Brands Showcase Collections for Women and Trans* Customers

March 12, 2014, 8:48 am

≫ Next: Yes, My Little Brother Steals My Beauty Products

≪ Previous: Being Open to Change, Going Short and Switching Color Line

dapperQ, the premier style and empowerment website for the unconventionally masculine, recently celebrated its five-year anniversary with a fashion show and after party co-produced by New York City's most sought-after lesbian DJ and event planner, Whitney Day. As the managing editor at dapperQ, I was honored to be a part of this important moment in fashion history.

You see, when I first started working started with dapperQ about four years ago, brands designing clothes for masculine presenting women, gender queers, and trans* identified individuals were few and far between. There were some "menswear for women" brands that sprouted here and there, offering a limited selection of boxers, snap-backs, and T-shirts. But, there was a serious dearth of brands that were addressing the specific needs of our readers. I would receive e-mails inquiring about where to find more formal clothes with a masculine silhouette that would be appropriate for work, interviews, weddings, and proms. The best advice I could give was to shop in traditional women's wear, menswear, and boys' departments and hope for the best. The problem with this was that none of the clothing offered in these departments appealed to our readers' tastes or fit their bodies. Button placement on women's wear garments is on the left, whereas button placement on menswear garments is on the right. Women's wear garments are also designed to accentuate curves and made with added "frills" and details, such as bust darts. On the other hand, menswear collections are not made to fit petite and curvy frames. As for boys clothing, it often fits petite frames in the waist and hips, but is too short in the arms and legs. To make matters even worse, readers shared countless stories about how, in the midst of their endless, fruitless searches, sales representatives ignored them, denied them access to certain dressing rooms, and tried to convince them to wear more feminine clothing.

Fast forward to BuzzFeed's 2013 article "9 Androgynous Clothing Labels You Should Know," a roundup of small companies that were founded since dapperQ's launch in 2009. These brands were not only smart business ideas that had the potential to generate profits from an underestimated and under-served market, but were also inspired by the genuine and personal frustrations that the companies' owners experienced with finding menswear that fits. At the same time the BuzzFeed article was published, dapperQ and Whitney Day were co-producing our first-ever multi-brand, queer New York Fashion Week runway show featuring four of the nine brands in the article's roundup. The show and after party were held in Williamsburg at a venue that captured the underground feel reflective of New York City's creative, fashion-forward queer scene.

Building off the success the first show, Whitney wanted to secure a bigger, swankier venue in Chelsea, Manhattan's gallery district and home to many of the city's "power gays." dapperQ invited brands from the first show to return to the runway, and also reached out to new brands we had been introduced to since the previous event. The result: seven queer-owned and queer-friendly brands showcasing menswear collections on 35 unconventionally masculine models at Avenue nightclub, followed by an after-party that included first-rate music, dancing, interactive modeling, and NYC queer community love.

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Yes, My Little Brother Steals My Beauty Products

March 12, 2014, 9:18 am

≫ Next: Size Matters: 5 Things Guys Need to Know About Clothes

≪ Previous: Seven Menswear Brands Showcase Collections for Women and Trans* Customers

I never thought my little brother would start stealing my beauty products. Food and drink? Certainly. The car when I needed it? Absolutely. I guess I never realized that boys need almost as much grooming as we do. Primping, however, is up to us.

My brother Christian has taught me how to share, him being the second child and all. We have always shared a bathroom and my beauty products were always up for grabs, but hasn't been tampered with until the past year.

Christian is starting to feel a little more comfortable "borrowing" some of my beauty products. I've also felt more comfortable testing a couple products on him.

little brother

My little brother Christian.

Quite frankly, he's lucky to have me. In his teenage years, he's won the battle against hormonal acne, grown out a curly, kinky Afro (he's now up for the "best hair" superlative at his school) and has created his own signature scent (I'll get to that in a minute). He did this all without purchasing one product with his own money.

Christian is just fortunate enough to be my curious, needy, bothersome little brother. But I'll be honest, I also love having him as my lab rat. Here are a few of the products he regularly steals from my beauty stash:

SoftSoap Juicy Pomegranate and Mango Infusions Body Wash

He absolutely adores the scent of this fruity body wash; a bit of a surprise considering the color, but the entire bathroom smells like a tropical wonderland (since we both use it). We've gotten used to buying the two-pack bottles in our house, which are a steal at $5.99.

Lotus Moon D20 Hydra Mist

This is from one of those trial-and-error moments. I wanted to see if it would make him feel refreshed post-workout. He said it smelled "nice," and the mist wasn't too harsh. That gives me the go-ahead to throw it in my gym bag!

Mario Badescu Drying Lotion

Let's face it, this product is pretty much unisex; it's basically a magic potion that zaps zits overnight. Being 18 and an athlete, acne plagues my brother quite frequently. And now he only has to apply it once a week.

Miss Jessie's Leave-In Condish

I use this leave-in conditioner to smooth out my roots on my relaxed hair; it really helps with that line of demarcation. I knew this would be good for his locks, and I told him to try it before he went on a date one day. Next thing you know, I had to give him his very own bottle. This stuff keeps his curls moisturized, bouncy and defined. He wants to grow his hair as long as possible (at the moment, he's looking like a curly lion cub), and this stuff keeps his hair healthy.

Nexxus Shampoo and Conditioner

Christian uses whatever shampoo and conditioner is in the shower. He doesn't know the price per ounce, how far you had to drive to get it, how many Amazon sellers you had to scroll through; he'll just use it. He likes the way these products smell, and they don't dry his hair out. I cast these aside to use other products I'd heard about on the blogs, but soon enough realized that my hair missed the hydrating combo.

Anything, and EVERYTHING, from Bath & Body Works

There's a reason why there's no space in this store for men to sit. There's also a reason all the men's products are at the back; they have to make their way through the delicious-smelling hand soaps and candles first. My brother enjoys the candle scents from here -- I'm not complaining as I'm a candle hoarder myself-- and when my mom and I gifted him with a couple of the men's fragrances, he fell totally in love. He even follows some of my fragrance tips and mixes and matches them to create his own unique scent!

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