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6 of The Best '90s Eyebrow Comebacks

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We're cool with '90s fashion resurfacing, but '90s beauty? No, thanks.

Case-in-point: pencil-thin eyebrows.

Lena Dunham said it best in her memoir, Not That Kind of Girl. She always keeps an eyebrow pencil in her bag because, "I overtweezed my eyebrows like every child of the nineties and am now stuck with what my sister calls balding caterpillars."

Thankfully, we seem to have recovered from said decade of ill-advised plucking--and so have some of our favorite celebrities. Check out this slideshow of before-and-afters. And remember: Fuller is better.

Drew Barrymore
Congrats, Drew. Your softer, fuller 2014 brows are scene-stealers.

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Gwen Stefani
She was just a girl with drawn-on brows. Now she's a woman with gorgeous arches.

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Tyra Banks
The supermodel's pointy brow shape has taken on a more subtle curve.

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Jennifer Aniston
The hair was famously full. The brows, not so much.

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Jessica Alba
From Dark Angel to dark arches.

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Kate Moss
She was waifish, and so were her barely-there arches.

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From bold eyebrows to bold hairstyles. Here's 8 celebrities rocking fauxhawks we love.

See more from PureWow.

Mirror, Mirror on the Wall: Ageless Beauty

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"Mirror, mirror on the wall, who's the fairest of them all?"

This is a true story, for women of all ages, to think about before running to a specialist to make them artificially look younger.

We all know the saying: "beauty is from within." We are told that it is a woman's persona, not her face or her age, which makes her beautiful. It is her personality, the mix of charm and warmth that makes her shine. We know this is true -- to a point.

When push comes to shove we know the word "youth" is attached to everything from A to Z. A "young woman" in her mid 30s is running to her "beauty maven" to fill her face with injections of Botox and collagen. After having a child, she has a tummy tuck. From exhaustion as a mom or career woman she has her eyes done and by mid or late forties she is off to "the best" plastic surgeon for her "first" facelift. Am I right or am I right?

"Young women" are just as crazed with the mirror as us older grand dames, except for one 93 year-old woman: my mother.

The other night my husband and I were leaving our building for an evening out. There were four very old women in the lobby, one of them, my mother. Every Saturday night seven of her girlfriends meet for dinner. They are all widows and childhood friends. I have known them since I was little. The youngest is 86 and the oldest is my mother, at 93.

I could not help looking at them as I walked over to give my mother a kiss. All of them had one or more facelifts except for my mother -- a lady who stands her ground! She had her eyes done when she was in her forties and was told at the time that the puffs under her eyes were hereditary. I knew better, even at my young age, but just smiled to myself and nodded.

Nonetheless, and I might be biased, but I swear my mother was the most beautiful of the four women, it was so obvious. Her girlfriends' faces were all pulled and smooth but you knew they were "old." Their hands were old. Their hair was thinning. Their statures were that of old women. They weren't fooling anyone except themselves.

On the other hand, my mother's face showed her life. The crinkles around her eyes and her smile lines made her face soft: her blue "unbagged" eyes sparkled! Her entire persona lit up the lobby of our building. She looked young compared to her friends with their pulled faces, who had lost their real smiles from all the tucks and pulls. Not my mother though, she was (and is) truly a beautiful "old" woman with the same smile I remember as a little girl.

So to my young friends, as well as my older friends, "be careful what you wish for." A nip here and a tuck there, a little Botox and collagen and even a peel to rid yourself of sun-tanned lines might uplift your spirits as you deal with aging in a society that places so much emphasis on staying young as long as possible -- but you aren't fooling anyone.

The moral of this story is to know when to draw the line. At what point can you be comfortable enough with yourself to revel in your own beauty at any age? You are beautiful; don't forget that. But, if you have the courage to go through the natural process of aging, like my mother, you will not regret it. Your natural beauty will shine brighter than any smoothed wrinkle or tummy tuck. This I promise you.

5 Things My Ombré Hair Taught Me About Life

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This past May I graduated college. With a summer ahead in Los Angeles, and that powerful feeling of needing to reinvent myself that most often comes after a breakup and two pints of Ben and Jerry's, I cut my hair 8 inches. And then did what all rational people do when they are both celebrity obsessed and need a life change: I pulled up pictures of Olivia Wilde, Miley Cyrus (in her formative years) and Drew Barrymore, and requested that their ombré hairstyle magically appear on my head. I am not embarrassed to admit that when it comes to trends, I am a devoted follower rather than a leader. In the 6th grade, I got side bangs after everyone else got side bangs. In high school, when Cady Herring started wearing army pants and flip flips, I started wearing army pants and flip flops. And so obviously when Jessica Biel (who is clearly doing something right, given her Justin Timberlake arm candy), showed up on a red carpet with ombré locks of pure perfection, I quickly sat in a too-chic-for-me Los Angeles hair salon and jumped on the bandwagon.

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It is now November, and I have just started a fabulous new job in Boston. And even though the leaves are falling and plaid is appearing on the backs of pinterest and pumpkin spice loving girls everywhere, my summer ombré hair still sits on the top of my head. As I reflect on both the transition out of college into the real world, and my hair evolution, I realize that the past six months of donning this trendy hairstyle have not been at all what I expected. I thought my blonder tips would give me that California-surfer-girl thing that I never seemed to master on my own, despite living on the West coast for the first 18 years of my life. And I also predicted that given my track record, I would be over it by the end of the summer and ready to try the next hair trend that Allure magazine tells me I absolutely, without-a-doubt, must have or I will die alone with 9 cats.

But to my surprise, my ombré has done so much more for me than help me score some #nofilter instagrams and compliments from my friends. It has been a free therapist. It has been like an extended browse through the Barnes and Noble self-help aisle. It has been like a guru that is always at my disposal. I'm being serious -- my ombré hair has taught me some fundamental things about life (and not only that Miley Cyrus looked way better before she decided that it would be a good idea to swing on a wrecking ball while in the nude). As I begin to accept that it officially time to swap my Haviannas for my JCREW booties, I'm reflecting on and sharing the five things that my oh-so-trendy ombré hair taught me about living.


1. It's never right on the first try

As much as I try to live by the mantra "progress, not perfection," I couldn't help but hope that my new (and shiny) ombré locks would blow in the breeze impeccably the minute I exited the salon, put on my sunnies, and got in the car. That, unfortunately, wasn't what happened. When I got home and looked in the mirror I realized that the highlights were a bit streaky and barely lighter than my hair color. It wasn't what I wanted, and it definitely what Jessica Biel would have wanted, but it took me almost a week and a half to muster the courage to call the salon to schedule an appointment so that they could re-do it.

My hair colorist responded to my call (which was really a desperate plea), with no hesitation -- "of course I'll fix it! Come on in! Let's get it the way you like it!" I guess I wasn't the first person in the history of hair styling to be unsatisfied with the initial result of highlights. As someone who really doesn't like complaining and running the risk of offending someone, this bump in my proverbial hair road challenged the part of me that would rather stay unhappy than make someone else feel uncomfortable. It also shed a light on my perfectionism and my need for instant gratification. But hair is such a perfect example of the cliché line that I still love: "life is a journey, not a destination." No color, cut, or style is permanent. And that's the good news! The problem was that my hair, and my hair stylist, had a more flexible attitude that I did! I cared only about a final result of perfect celebrity look-a-like ombré, but like all things in life, ombré is a process.

Once I started to understand this, and made my way back into the salon chair, I took a deep breath and accepted that both hair, and life, are usually never right on the first try.

2. It works better if approached gradually and in moderation, then all at once.

We've all seen those pictures of the ombré that looks like last season's color blocking trend, and/or prison stripes, and we think to ourselves, "absolutely not...is she crazy?!" But then when we sit in the salon chair we begin to be overcome by eagerness. The prospect of actually being able to test if blondes have more fun is enticing. And before we know it, we're blonde on bottom, brunette on top, and we realize the black and white trend was better left to those bakery cookies at the corner café. The best ombré is gradual. It fades with ease from a warm brunette to a golden blonde. When done well, you can't really see where one color starts and the other stops. The most natural looking ombré is done in moderation, aimed to enhance once's overall look rather than distract from it. I'm so glad my hairstylist reminded me to go with what looked and felt natural. I had to start slow. And test out the waters. No good hair deed comes out of compulsivity and urgency. So I did a slight ombre, and at the end of the summer, I went and brightened up a bit more.

Once I started to understand this, and made my way back into the salon chair, I took a deep breath and accepted that both hair, and life, work better if approached gradually and in moderation, than all at once.

3. It'll never look like the pictures

In addition to being the title of a 1997 movie starring none other than Jennifer Aniston, "picture perfect" is an ideal that I've struggled to achieve for a large part of my life. Not helping this ideal were my a few of my favorite things as a teenager: Vogue, Romantic Comedies, and Lauren Conrad. When I showed up at the hair salon on that summer day, my hair dresser assured me she would do her best to match my color to the magazine cutout I provided, but that a perfect match was impossible. IMPOSSIBLE?! My hair came out a little lighter than Olivia Wilde's and a little darker than Jessica Biel and I got to thinking about why I spend so much time chasing "picture-perfect," instead of just being as I am and experiencing life directly as it comes. When I went back in August, I didn't come with a picture. I came with my hair. On my head. And I asked her to make it a shinier and glossier version of what it already was.

Once I started to understand this, and made my way back into the salon chair, I took a deep breath and accepted that both hair, and life, will never look like the pictures.

4. It grows with you, not against you

Being that my summer ombré adventure was the first time I had ever colored my hair, I wanted a style that didn't require too much maintenance (a.k.a ROOTS!). One of the things that appealed to me so much about ombré was its reputation as a no-fuss hairstyle. I began thinking about what an ombré approach to my life would be and started to look at all the ways I work against myself. Those countless self-sabotaging relationships, the nagging self-criticisms...I was more work to upkeep than my hair color. I reflected on how easy it is to feel victimized by life and to feel that things are happening to me. But what if life is happening for me? What if all the events that may seem so difficult and painful in the moment are really lessons in the curriculum of my growth?

Once I started to understand this, and made my way back into the salon chair, I took a deep breath and accepted that (thankfully!) both hair, and life, gros with you, not against you.

4. It will inevitably change with time

I'm finally getting ready to make a hair appointment and go back to my all-over brown shade. More importantly, I'm grateful that as my ombré has grown out, I've outgrown it as well. As the months went on and I began to spend less time by the beach, the blonde began taking on different undertones. And now that its November, my ombré hair is not the ombré hair I obsessed about getting perfect in May. It's transformed, and reminded me how futile it is to obsess over things that inevitably change with time. As I loosen my grip on my perfect hair color, I feel more able to loosen my grip on having the perfect relationship, or having the perfect job, or having the perfect apartment. When I was younger I use to fear change, but as I'm growing up, I realize that change is actually a good thing--its rejuvenating and allows for new beginnings, more importantly, new hairstyles.

Now that I understand this, and am about to make my way back into the salon chair, I take a deep breath and accept that both hair, and life, will inevitably change with time.

And thank the hair gods for that!

Bra Size: A Little Education Goes a Long Way

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In recent years, women have taken a stand for knowing more about our bodies. It's all about unapologetically educating ourselves on the ins and outs of being a woman. But even with that-women are still shockingly unaware of their own breasts.

According to a study from Swiss lingerie company Triumph, nearly two-thirds of women are currently wearing the wrong bra size. What's worse is that of the 10,000 surveyed, according to Women's Wear Daily, 29 percent are aware they are wearing ill-fitted braziers. Wearing the wrong sized bra won't risk your life, but it can cause every day discomfort and does raise the question of why are we still so disconnected from our own bodies.

Lingerie companies across the world have taken to finding ways to help women understand their true bra size. But is that enough? For whatever reason -- cost, convenience or not understanding sizing metrics -- have caused women to keep putting on bras that just don't fit the bill or properly care for their assets. Even more so, many of us rely on ill-trained staffing at corporate lingerie stores to give us our "true" bra size every time we're browsing the latest sales rack.

In an effort to help women take control of their bra buying, Tomima Edmark, founder of HerRoom.com and a lingerie expert with over 14 years of experience, has launched an initiative to properly educate women on their breasts and bra sizes. Her angle? "All the videos are based on education," says Edmark, "I don't feel we women should have to be measured by women who aren't educated."

A new infographic, displayed below, highlights seven bra fitting secrets that are revealed in educational videos. 'I've been doing this for over 14 years and no two women are the same,' says Edmark, "only you know your breasts, so you're the best person to size yourself."



With a little education, women have the ability to take control of both their bra buying and sizing. Never find yourself in the hands of an uneducated bra fitter again. Take control of your breasts by understanding how to size them properly.

I'm An Introvert Who Married An Extrovert. Here's How We Make It Work

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By Cody Mullins

When you're an introvert, having friends takes on a different meaning. My parents noticed early on that I had very few friends, but the friendships I did have were solid. Now I'm a 35-year-old married dad with two girls and nothing has changed.

For the last 20 years, outside of my wife, I've really only had one good friend. My friend and I met in 9th grade during football practice, and the rest is history. He was my roommate in college, the best man at my wedding, and even though we now live 3,700 miles apart, he still reaches out the moment he learns that something isn't going well with my life.

My wife is the only other person who has been able to insert herself into my life as a friend and I now consider her to be my best friend. I don't say "I love you" to just anyone, and I sure don't make just anyone my best friend. Over the last 15 years, I've come across maybe five people I would consider spending time with outside of work. So obviously, my wife has a lot of time to be my only friend and my introverted self doesn't want/need to find any other pals to help fill that void.

More from YourTango: My Wife's Depression Almost Ended Our Marriage

My wife couldn't be more different. She makes friends with ease and has lots of 'em; her friendships are very important to her. They serve as a support system in her life and the more support she has, the better she feels about herself. She has friends she has met online, friends she met through family, and even friends she's met on vacation. What we don't have are many couple friends and that's my fault. My inability to make friends with the spouses of her friends has caused tension and was one of the reasons she decided at one point that she wanted a break from our marriage.

Up until recently, my wife didn't bother to understand how an introverted brain works. She has since read books about introverts and has asked me more about my experience, but she'll never fully grasp why I'm an introvert. She won't ever fully understand my reluctance to let anyone into my world. She won't ever figure out why I wouldn't want a ton of friends in my life the same way she has in her life. Likewise, I don't understand why my wife allows just anyone into her life and opens herself up to betrayal and disappointment by having so many casual friends. I certainly don't understand the way she classifies her friends in some sort of tier arrangement.

But what I don't understand the most is why she doesn't classify me as as her best friend.

In her words: "I will always be able to do anything I do with my friends with you, whether you enjoy it or not is a different story. However, there are things that I do with you that I would never do with any of my friends (or anyone else) no matter how close we were."

More from YourTango: I Was A Teen Bride And Blamed My Husband For My Failed Career

Although I don't think we'll ever fully understand each other, over the course of 13 years of marriage, we've learned that fixing each other doesn't work as well as trying to meet in the middle and work with each other through whatever issues seem to come between us. As a result, I've tried to make more of an effort to appear friendlier when we meet with other couples, and she tries to help facilitate those friendships in a more introverted manner.

We've also come to realize that the more we understand our differences, the more we realize how much it benefits our marriage. For instance, because I don't have many friends, I don't go out very often, which means I'm home... a lot. And because I'm home a lot, I can take care of our kids while my wife spends quality time with her friends. This arrangement allows us both to spend time in our comfort zones; it makes us happy. And there's one thing that is as sure in marriage, as death and taxes are in real life: a happy wife truly makes for a happy life.

This article originally appeared at YourTango.

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I'll Never Get Another Blowout (Yeah, Right): Tales From a Curly Girl

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Recently there was an article in the New York Times about curly hair. I am always drawn to articles about curly hair, because, well, I have curly hair and if you have curly hair, then you know what I mean. Curly hair is not technically considered an affliction. Afflictions are really bad. They are not life-and-death situations but they can complicate your daily existence. So, curly hair girls will mostly agree that if afflictions are things that complicate your daily existence, then having curly hair is an affliction.

Before you go all bonkers on me in the comments and start writing things about real afflictions and things like wars overseas and how can I write about curly hair being a problem when people are dying and I'm so insensitive, please realize that I know that having curly hair is not that big of a deal, and I understand its position on the hard-knocks totem pole. But you probably have straight hair.

The article talked about trend-setting curly girls in enviable positions embracing their curls, spurning blowouts, going au naturel. The New York Times said curly hair is "modern" and "now cool." Oh, thank you New York Times. It's nice to know that I am now modern and cool. Or at least that my hair is.

Most curly girls are aware that there are very few curly role models out there. Most of the time you see an actress or a model with curly hair, her hair was blown straight and then curled. I know this because I asked my hairdresser. Do you know how long that takes? The other problem with curly hair in the media is that it's usually a "before" look -- before the main character becomes pretty, confident and self-actualized. Think Julia Roberts in Pretty Woman or Anne Hathaway in The Princess Diaries.

I spent my teens with huge curly hair. But that was the 80s and that was how it was. I spent my 20s and 30s with my hair in ponytails and buns. I had no clue how to reign in my crown of chaos. I would blow out my hair once in a while and then try to make it last for days. I tried to ignore that one spot in the back of the head that you physically can't straighten yourself. Curly girls know that spot; they're probably more familiar with it than their G-spots, and we curly girls can spot it on another curly girl from far range (especially when you're sitting in a back row at a wedding). Toward my late 30s/early 40s, after being inspired by my friend Allison who was cultivating and embracing her curls, I finally learned how to do my curly hair so that it turned out pretty and not frizzy.

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My mom tamed the baby curls with braids


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Authentic 80s prom picture -- my shoes matched my dress


For all you curvy haired ladies, here's my regimen. I share in the hope that it can help one curly girl out there. Be prepared: It's a whole fricking production. (Straighties, you can skip to the next paragraph.) I only wash my hair a couple of times per week. I use a curly girl shampoo and comb out the knots with my fingers while the conditioner is in. I rake out handfuls of hair, but I've been told that's normal. It doesn't seem normal. I use a lightweight terrycloth towel or paper towels to squeeze a bit of water out of my hair, taking care to leave it essentially dripping wet. That is the key to good curls: applying product to soaking wet hair.

I use one squirt of curl cream (too little and my hair frizzes, too much and it looks a bit oily, oy) and rake it through my hair doing a kind of up-scrunch as I go. Then I wait one and a half to two hours for it to dry. No touching while it dries. The dripping wet part is tough in the winter as I often freeze. And tough when I have somewhere to go and a short getting-ready time. My hair turns out different each and every time. With the right weather and sufficient kissing up to the curl goddesses, the curls behave. The rest of the time my hair is a frizzy, knotty, crown of hell. That's where the bun becomes my look.

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My go-to bun


Here's what's stupid. I feel like a traitor when I get a blowout. So I feel like a traitor quite often. I've had my hair blown out for most of the special occasions in my life. Except when my babies were born. I was not getting hair and makeup when my babies were born, although I'm told that's now a thing. When my hair is smooth and glossy with that trademark blowout bounce, I feel like I'm trying to be someone I'm not (as if the padded bras and highlights weren't bad enough). But, I'm just gonna say it: I feel prettier when my hair's blown out. More professional, more sophisticated. I feel I'm taken more seriously. And that is something that a lot of my curly friends also say. When my hair's curly, I feel sassier and more playful but less serious and less polished.

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Curly...


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...and straight


So, thank you New York Times for the backhanded compliment. And for bringing curls to the forefront of style. We curly girls appreciate your validation. Thank you straighties for all the times you said you'd kill for my hair, although I give you one day with this head and then I bet you'll reconsider. Thank you blow-dry bars for propagating like bunnies. Thank you curls for building my character (because, no, the teenage acne couldn't do that all by itself). I will continue trying to embrace my mane of madness. But don't give me a hard time the next time you see me with a blowout.

Susie Orman Schnall is a writer and author who lives in New York with her husband and three young boys. Her award-winning debut novel On Grace (SparkPress 2014) is about fidelity, friendship and finding yourself at 40. Her second novel The Balance Project: A Novel (SparkPress 2015) is about work-life balance which is also the theme of her popular interview series The Balance Project. Visit Susie's website for more information.

The Hollywood Reporter's 25 Best Beauty Moments of the Year Celebrates the Beauty Pros

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Of the stories I get to write, The Hollywood Reporter's annual 25 Best Beauty Moments of the Year" has been my fave over the past three years. Why? Because along with my fantastic editor, Carol, we come up with hair and makeup looks from the red carpet, film and television that stand out for their uniqueness, provocativeness and, well, beauty. And in the process I get to interview the people who created these looks, who have become celebrities in their own right: They have hundreds of thousands of Instagram and Twitter followers and get recognized on the street (last year, hairstylist Chris McMillan told me how he was approached on the street in New York City and later in the Barneys underwear department following a tweeted photo of him and client Miley Cyrus). And that's the beauty of this story -- we get to celebrate these artists and call out their work, and their A-list clientele are happy to get in on it as well, being photographed with them for the issue.

After all, they spend a lot of time together: makeup artist Jeanine Lobell told me that she and client Cate Blanchett prepped in and later shared the same hotel suite for the Golden Globes this year (where Blanchett said she received rave reviews for her raspberry-pink lip). Salma Hayek was the maid of honor in hairstylist Robert Vetica's wedding. And Cameron Diaz has lived and traveled with her glam team, makeup artist Robin Fredriksz and hairstylist Lona Vigi. Diaz, Fredriksz and Vigi were photographed for the issue. As were Gwen Stefani and hairstylist Danilo, Emily Blunt and makeup artist Jenn Streicher and Kerry Washington and makeup artist Carola Gonzalez (among others). But none of them made our top spot on this year's list. To find out who got the top honor and see the beautiful photographs, the magazine is on newsstands now and online here.

The Latest Groom Trend? Lumberjack Chic

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By Rachel Torgerson for TheKnot.com

The latest look for grooms to rock is lumberjack style -- we're talking about plaid flannel shirts, pine cone boutonnieres, woolen vests and hiking boots. Stay with us on this one, because it can actually really work in the right setting.

Sure, it's not your classic formalwear but just like woodland and rustic barn weddings are becoming more popular, so are casual looks for grooms and groomsmen -- and we don't hate it! Steal ideas for a rugged groom's look below.

Wear a dark plaid shirt.

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Tonie Christine Photography

Pair with jeans and brown hiking boots.

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Connection Photography

Or wear with mustard colored khakis.

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Redfield Photography

More from The Knot: Stress-Free Destination Wedding Spots

Accessorize with brown leather details.

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Lauren Fair Photography

Add fuzzy wool vests and suit jackets.

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Connection Photography

Pin a rustic boutonniere to his lapel.

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Redfield Photography

More from The Knot: 25 Prettiest Wedding Cakes

Have the whole gang join in.

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Redfield Photography

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Lies Lies Lies

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I just learned about the "Pheme Project", inspired by Greek mythology, Phema the personification of fame and renown, would pry into the affairs of mortals and Gods, then repeat what she learned. The project is financed by the EU, and will help detect lies spread on the web by analyzing the source, diffusion circuit, etc.... Inspired by the "Phema project" I decided to only say the truth and nothing but, for the coming 24 hours. Armed with honesty and candidness I started my day.

9:00 A friend sends me a whassapp with a picture of her outfit of the day. My reply was straight- forward, negative. I didn't hear from her for the rest of the day.

9:10 While putting on my makeup, I realized that makeup is sort of like lying...I opted for just mascara (What woman would want to be caught completely makeup free in the fashion environment?) White lie.

9:45 A friend posted a picture of herself on Facebook. In the midst of all the "looking fab" comments, I couldn't help writing "I've seen you under better lights"!

10:00 On my way to office, I bump into a colleague who shows me a picture of two different pairs of shoes she was wondering about buying. I say neither because they will not suit your style. She gives me a suspicious look.

10:30 A renowned TV presenter steps into the office to show me her latest buy: An orange top she can't wait to wear on air. I discourage her, explaining bluntly that she should ban this color from her closet as her skin and hair color don't blend with orange. She secretly puts a spell on me and leaves the office, storming.

11:30 Time for coffee. My assistant offers to order one from a nearby coffee shop. While doing so I notice that her shoes don't suit her outfit and tell her so.

12:30 Still no coffee.. I suspect my assistant cancelled the order after my remark.

12:37 I prepare a coffee mug and try to relax while checking my email. One of the hairdressers at the Image Department hurries inside the office to show me a hairdo he did for one of the TV anchors. I glance up from my computer and shake my head. He stands there with a question mark on his face. I tell him, bluntly, that what he did is hideous. He leaves, speechless.

12:45 In the elevator a colleague proudly shows me her recent blepharoplasty. I tell her it changed the shape of her eyes. She couldn't disagree more and leaves the elevator fuming.

13:00 On my way to the restaurant for lunch, I was thinking I will not survive a full day of truth telling. My honesty is not being appreciated.

13:15 A Dubai police car follows me. I admit I was on the phone while driving. They salute my honesty and let me go after I promise to be more careful. Honesty finally pays off!

14:45 I drop by my hairdresser for a quick blow dry. He asks me if I liked the haircut he did for a friend. I say. No. He repays me by doing a horrible job on my hair.

15:30 I start thinking about all the small lies I've said in my life and that had made the people around me happy.

15:45 Still working the "truth oath" in my staff meeting, I go around the table, clearly pointing out to each member what I really think about their work, and what my expectations of them are.

16:45 Everybody is on "alert mode", avoiding me like the plague. I offer them a round of coffee and switch gears to a lighter, more encouraging tone with more positive feedback. People start to relax, and I can feel a burgeoning cheerfulness in the air.

My day-long experiment in truth telling, failed. It made me and the people around me miserable. Masking the tough truth with kind words and finding a nicer way to say unpleasant things is much easier to say and accept.

I vowed to be more diplomatic in voicing my opinions. That does not mean, I will not continue to be frank and say out loud what I think, but a little sugar coating goes a long way.

Design History Minute: My Night as Dorothy Draper

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As I shared last post, this year I dressed as Dorothy Draper for Halloween. With a crown of feathers, pin curls, and a smashing vintage dress dripping in rhinestones and topped with a fabulous boa, I embodied Dorothy Draper. While not a soul knew who I was, I felt classic, poised, and glamorous, just as I imagined Dorothy would.

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Me as Dorothy. How I'd do?

But why did I choose Dorothy and not Candace or Elsie? I absolutely adore Dorothy Draper. Her work is so iconic of 20th-century interior design. Her style is bright and eclectic, mixing unexpected pieces in a fabulously dramatic way that stills looks fresh and contemporary all these years later. She's credited with inventing the Hollywood Regency style, so we can thank her for introducing drama and color and balancing glam with classic.

The best part about loving Dorothy? One of her most famous works, The Greenbrier Hotel in West Virginia, still maintains her 1940s interior designs, thanks to her protégé Carleton Varney. A time capsule of sorts, it's pure eye candy for visitors and a must-see for interior design fans.

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A seating area in the upper lobby of The Greenbrier. Courtesy of The Greenbrier.

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The grand staircase in The Greenbrier's palatial Presidential Suite. Courtesy of The Greenbrier.


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One of the seven bedrooms in The Greenbrier's Presidential Suite, perfectly showcasing Dorothy Draper's signature style. Courtesy of The Greenbrier.

Want to learn more about Dorothy Draper and her style? Pick up a copy of her vintage book Decorating is Fun, or check out Carleton Varney's In the Pink: Dorothy Draper, America's Most Fabulous Decorator.

While I was technically only Dorothy for just one night, I try to channel my inner Dorothy Draper on a daily basis. Whether it's through design or fashion, I always mix unexpected pieces for a twist or add a pop of glam. Plaid shirt with rhinestone necklace? Why not. Motorcycle jacket with a feminine dress? Do it up! While Dorothy wouldn't have considered plaid shirts or leather jackets, you can pack her style with eclectic pairings that add a bit of drama.

How do you channel your inner Dorothy Draper?

3 Reasons Why Bra Brands Should Welcome Men With Breasts

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More and more men are struggling to find bras to support their developing breasts. Gynecomastia (male breast growth) is a well-documented medical condition linked to several causes, and is a side effect of many common prescription and over-the-counter drugs. According to some experts, nearly half of all men will experience gynecomastia at some point in their lives but will be too embarrassed to consult a physician about the problem. The only treatment options for men who grow breasts are (a) breast reduction surgery, or (b) wearing a bra.

Why should the intimate apparel industry pay attention to this non-traditional group of potential bra buyers?

First, their numbers are growing. While some choose surgery (over 20,000 annually, with male breast reduction surgeries up 13 percent since 2000), it's not an option for everyone. Many can't afford the cost or aren't medically eligible. Their stories can be found on the very active gynecomastia forums, where information on bra wear is shared. There's even a male blogger in Germany who posts helpful bra reviews. But men with breasts don't always know where to buy a bra, or if they'll be rejected by fitters or stores. Many find female friends or a compassionate spouse to help with basic bra issues.

Second, they have a real need. Men with breasts can't hide their breasts under extra baggy t-shirts and jackets. They work in all industries, represent a wide range of ages, and measure from B to H cups. Many are looking for relief from constant back aches, in addition to reducing everyday bounce. Some males look for sports-like compression or classic minimizers, while others appreciate more fashionable bras. Their tastes are as varied as those of female bra buyers.

Third, men with breasts look for quality construction and exhibit solid brand loyalty. They approach bra fit and buying in a very matter-of-fact way. Those who write to me or comment on my blog appreciate well-made bras. They are familiar with brand names like Playtex, Wacoal, and Panache and also Simone Perele, Empriente, and Prima Donna. Unlike some female bra buyers, they're not splurging on a new bra because they're dating someone new. (Quite the contrary, most men with breasts try to keep their bra wear hidden and often wear vests over shirts as extra camouflage.)

It's not clear whether this new bra wearer is taken seriously by the intimate apparel industry. In my conversations with brands at a recent lingerie trade show, no one seemed very interested in talking about this niche market. Instead they laughed off the issue with a "we'll take all customers" attitude. This may represent a willingness to allow men to buy their bras. But there's no real compassion for or focus on treating men as "normal" bra-buying customers.

How could this underserved group be helped? Bra brands could add a male bra fitter to their bra fitting team, if only on-line or as a phone resource. Brands might reach out to the female fitters who have fit men, and ask for their advice. Industry insiders could put together a focus group of guys who wear bras, in order to assess their needs. Bra retailers could train female employees or have policies about men who ask for bra fittings in their stores.

The bra industry could welcome this new group of bra wearers because of the very real medical reasons why men need to wear bras. As one 45-year-old male said, "it's about time that the world is accepting that men also have boobs, and some need to wear a bra."

What do you think? Should bra brands be doing more for the growing population of men who wear bras?

This article first appeared at Lingerie Briefs.

10 Curvy Models Calvin Klein Could Have Used Instead

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Look, there's no denying that Myla Dalbesio is a beautiful woman and model who deserves to be as famous and ubiquitous as Kate "cat daddy" Upton. This isn't about shaming her for being a size 10; there should be room in the industry for all sizes. The problem comes in when Calvin Klein thinks they deserve a whopping pat on the back for picturing Dalbesio in their newest ad. I guess in their minds, featuring a woman well below the national size average is some sort of panacea for the overall dearth of body diversity in the fashion industry. The fault is not Dalbesio's, however, who serves as a reminder that successful models don't need to be stick thin. The fault lies with huge fashion brands that, time and time again, fail to include diverse body types in order to challenge unattainable beauty norms and become more reflective of society.

Without further ado, here are some ladies who we want to see shake up the fashion industry.

1. Elly Mayday

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Via Aparte Photography


This rad chick is a Canadian plus-size lingerie model. After a recent bout of rare ovarian cancer, Mayday continued making waves in the Canadian fashion industry. She began sporting her hysterectomy scars and bald head in various ad campaigns for the lingerie brand Forever Yours. You go, girl.

2. Kerosene Deluxe

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Via Andrea Hausmann Photography


Along with Elly Mayday, Kerosene Deluxe is featured in a Canadian documentary called A Perfect 14. This badass woman had humble beginnings working in cosmetology, until a photographer spotted her at a much-frequented fetish event and proposed a shoot. Since then, there's been no turning back for Deluxe -- and we aren't complaining.

3. Mia Tyler

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Via Celebrity Tattoo Design


The daughter of Steven Tyler (and, yes, the sister of Liv) is no stranger to being in the Hollywood limelight. Famous kin aside, this beauty has had a successful modeling career of her own. Here's to hoping we see way more of Mia in the future!

4. Philomena Kwao

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Via Cosmopolitan U.K.


At size 16, Philomena has been touted as Britain's first black, plus-size model. So far, she has checked being featured in Cosmopolitan U.K. off her bucket list. Here's hoping she takes the rest of the world by storm, fast.

5. Denise Bidot

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Via Victoria Janashville Photography


This Latina model currently resides in New York City, but has been featured in ad campaigns across the globe. You can find some of her spreads in Glamour or Cosmopolitan for Latinas. She has also worked with biggie retailers like Forever21, Levis and Macy's.

6. Katya Zharkova

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Via Plus Model Magazine


Much like Philomena in the U.K., Katya is regarded as a plus-size modeling pioneer in her native country of Belarus. This pretty lady has been modeling since the wee age of 14. In 2013, she was named Plus Model Mag's Woman of the Year. The spread for that is featured above! Can you say: "Ooh lala?"

7. Jada Sezer

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Via Rebel Romance


In a piece for The Independent, the 23-year-old British model told the magazine: "People clap for Beyoncé and Jennifer Lopez being curvy women, but they're size 8 to 10, and they have personal trainers... Sometimes magazines throw in a plus-size model as a goodwill gesture, but they're not taken seriously." Couldn't have said it better, Jada.

8. Ashley Graham

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Via Manik Mag


Ashley is a lingerie model for Lane Bryant. She's been featured in Vogue, Glamour and has been the face of many Levi campaigns. She also made headlines after starring in this sexy ad, which was banned from being shown before 8 p.m. because it was deemed too revealing.



Those five-minute-long Victoria's Secret Angel's Collection ads, though? So modest.

9. Marquita Pring

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Via Complex.com


Believe it or not, this curvy bombshell was dropped by the mega modeling agency, Ford Models, after they decided to cut their plus-size division. Um, that was a huge mistake. She's been featured in Cosmopolitan, and now works with IMG Models where she has all the freedom to be herself.

10. Tara Lynn

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Via H&M and The Curvy Fashionista


Tara has been featured on various covers of Elle magazine throughout Europe, and she was the face of H&M's "Big Is Beautiful" campaign in 2011. She has been candid about her experiences with discrimination in the industry and hopes to change how fashion brands represent beauty. We say, she's right on track to fulfilling that wish.

For more, visit: DebateOut

Follow us on Twitter: @DebateOut

Coco Rocha Created 1000 Poses for Her New Book

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Coco Rocha, a supermodel known for her versatility, just released her first-ever published book, Study of Pose to show off her breathtaking talent and teach others the art of the pose.

The book showcases the 26-year-old Canadian model posing in 1,000 different ways wearing just a simple, tan leotard, which by the way only, "[Took] three days. Although, I keep saying I think we could have done it in one day," said Rocha in our interview last week. Blurring the worlds of fashion and dance over the years, her expressive body language quickly gained her the nickname "Queen of Pose", and her range of curves and contorted twists have featured her in campaigns for the likes of Chanel, Longchamp, Dolce & Gabanna and Christian Dior. The former Face coach, who worked with famed photographer Steven Sebring on the project, admits it was a challenging task but completely doable -- of course it was, she's the posing pro! Sebring shot all 1,000 poses on what he calls his "rig": a geodesic dome filled with cameras that shoot simultaneously, producing images that can be viewed from 360 degrees. The "rig" is the same camera that Rocha used to video her pregnancy announcement.

This December, Coco and Steven will be releasing an app version of the book -- which will include renderings of each pose visible from 360 degrees, and we cannot wait to download it. Last week, Modelinia spoke with the mother-to-be about details on the book, revealing her favorite pose and what she's most looking forward to about being a mother -- read her full interview below:

What inspired the book?

I met our photographer, Steven Sebring, a few years prior to making the book. At the time, he had come up with what we called "the rig," which is essentially a device with 100 cameras and me being shot from the middle. He hadn't yet announced to the world that he had fabricated this technology yet and we were just kind of playing around with it. In one of those sessions, he said that in the Nineties, he actually wanted to create an encyclopedia of poses, but he couldn't quite find the right model. I don't know, maybe models then didn't have a repertoire for posing. When he mentioned this to us, he was just kind of joking about it, but on the side, James and I were thinking 'wow,' this would actually be a really great idea. We could call it Study of Pose. Then for whatever reason,1,000 came up as the number of poses we could include in the book--why 1,000 I don't know, at the time it seemed like an achievable number, but also an aggressive number. And so a week after bringing it to Steven, we started shooting and that was about two years ago. In the book world, things definitely take a lot longer than in magazines, so it was definitely a learning curve for us. But we did it and I think by pose 800 I was done and I thought let's make this book just 800 poses, that's still a really good number, but they were like 'no, you can finish.' And so James and Steven really started to look up inspiration--we wanted to make sure the book was not just random poses, but also made reference to pop culture, art history, and film, all of that. We really wanted this to be more of a great reference book for future artists out there. Models yes, but also painters, sculptors, poets--you name it.

Was it a challenge coming up with those 1,000 poses, or did you find that most of them flowed out of you throughout the process?

When we started, we were really trying to figure out how we go from pose 1 to 1,000 without finding ourselves thinking, "Have we done this before?" So we would go in there and say "okay, let's start with cross legs and from cross legs shift your body in certain directions and do those different variations before moving on to the next thing." If we did ever get stuck at a point that's when James would be ready with a new idea or moment in time like Venus rising from the sea from art history, Michael Jackson from pop culture, or Charlie Chapman from film, to inspire us and have me copy the best that I could. Although, if you ask me, 800 was still the magic number of poses before we really had to start searching for the inspiration.

How long did it take you to actually shoot the 1,000 poses?

Three days. Although, I keep saying I think we could have done it in one day. The only reason it actually took all three days was because we were working with the rig, so not only is there just the book format, but we're also coming out with an app soon, which will show each of these poses in a 360 degree viewing. So with this technology, we would shoot a pose and then we'd have to wait 10-15 seconds for it to reboot, which is far unlike on normal photo-shoots where you could just keep going.

How does the app differ from the actual book?

The book and the app are two totally different experiences. What is so exciting about having both of these mediums, is that the book is an entity of authority--you look at it and it's timeless--but the app is this new way of experiencing an art book. I also keep thinking of a sculptor, who doesn't need a standing subject anymore because he could pick any position in the app and instantly be able to see the entire form right there. I think that's pretty unique in and of itself. They are both a great source of reference, but also two very different experiences.

Did you learn anything new while doing this project?

I think there can no longer be such a thing as hitting a wall on a photo shoot. If I ever hear a photographer say to me 'ok, what else?' I should retire, because that should never happen now having experienced just how much the body is capable of doing. Yes, there are a lot of quirky, fun, ridiculous poses in this book and maybe fashion doesn't want all of that, but on the other hand, I've always been the model that doesn't take herself too seriously and with this project, I've realized that I can go even further with that.

What do you hope up-and-coming models and artist take away from this book?

An experience, if anything. If you think of any past artist, there was something that they looked at that inspired them to make their most famous pieces, whether it be the Mona Lisa or Venus Rising. There was something that made them project those paintings or those photographs, so I would love to think that this book would be that to the future artist or the future models. I love to think that they would look at this and something would click and inspire them to make that next great piece of art hanging in the Louvre. I would like it to be something that is studied in this industry and the art industry as something that artists must-have as if it were studied as part of their curriculum. I think that would be pretty cool.

Do you have a favorite pose out of the 1,000?

Pose 1,000 is pretty hilarious. If only because about halfway through the book we said 'wouldn't it be funny if for the last pose it looked like I was ripping my hair out and my makeup was all smeared because I had been pushed to my limit and just couldn't give you anymore.' So I think that's my favorite pose, but honestly there are a lot of really beautifully pieces in there that I look at now and think, 'how did my body do that?' Even now people will open the book randomly and say 'ok, no repeat that one,' and I look at it and think, 'I don't even know what I'm doing there.' There are some very interesting poses in there for sure.

You announced your pregnancy to the world using the same technology as you used to create the book. What inspired you to announce it in that way?

I think these days there are just so many ways to announce a pregnancy that I just really wanted it to be different. I always like to be a little different and plus, having Steven as a friend and this rig at your fingertips it was just kind of like 'well, why not?' As for now, we're hoping go back each month to take a photo on the rig so that after nine months you can see this little bump growing and spinning into the image of the baby finally being there.

Have you come up with a special pregnancy pose yet? Pose 1,001 perhaps?

No, not yet. Although, maybe there is a pregnancy pose in there somewhere--we'll have to figure that out. It's funny though because when we were filming the pregnancy video I kept thinking 'how am I supposed to hold my hands?' It's actually a really funny thing to think about in the moment. So yeah, I'm going to have to see how this posing with a bump works out.

Has your approach to fashion and style changed at all since learning of your pregnancy?

Not yet. Of course, the pants and shirts are starting to get a little tighter, but I actually can't wait until I actually have to go out and buy new maternity outfits. I'm excited to see what I'm actually going to wear with this little bump. That's what I'm most excited about--showing off my bump. I always remember seeing Heidi Klum and other celebrities walking the red carpet in these perfect red carpet gowns with their baby bumps and thinking, 'will I have the chance to wear a really cool gown like that?' Otherwise, I don't think my style will really change in any way. I always think that some of those moms who are rocking cool fashion looks while walking their little babies in a stroller is just the bomb. You don't have to all of a sudden have to transition into 'mom' outfits from the '90s just because you became a mom.

Speaking of your style, what are some of your key off-duty pieces right now?

I have a huge amount of white button-down shirts right now. They're just really fun to be able to dress up or dress down depending on the occasion. I do tend to wear black heels almost every day. I think it's fun to dress up, although sometimes you do get a little tired of it, but I definitely try to have a different look every day. Like today, today is my menswear-inspired tie day and last night at the K.I.D.S./Fashion Delivers Gala was my Zac Posen gown day. It's all about changing it up and having fun it.

Have either your mother or mother-in-law shared any parental words of wisdom with you since learning of your pregnancy?

It's funny because when I first announced that I was pregnant, I was a little afraid of how much advice people were going to share with me, which you take but on the other hand, you're afraid it might just end up overwhelming you. But almost everyone that has given me advice so far has said 'don't listen to anyone's advice.' So I've actually asked my mother and mother-in-law for advice more than they have given me, which has been very nice.

Have you already started shopping?

My mother and mother-in-law are actually in town right now, so they just went to American Apparel and picked up a little zip-up sweater and matching sweater pants and a little black t-shirt--it's adorable. I also have a 'Coco Made Me Do It' tee that I gave to James, which his mom later made into a 'James Made Me Do It' shirt for our wedding and now she's getting a little black t-shirt for the baby that's going to say 'Mommy and Daddy Made Me Do It.' So it's all very cute.

Have you already started nesting?

We're starting to do that very soon. We find out soon if it's a boy or a girl, so once that happens then I'm sure we'll really hone in on the room and stocking up on little boots and pants. I'm one of those people who likes to plan everything out, so for right now I'm just waiting to see what we're having before starting any decorating.

What are looking forward to most about being a mother?

Wow, I don't know, everything! I'm excited to see who this little person is, what he or she is going to look like, will they have his [James] lips--I hope they have his lips--whose personality will they have? I think all of that is really interesting.

More on Modelinia.com:

Heidi Klum is the Face of Sharper Image's Holiday Campaign!


Drink Up! Alessandra, Coco and Lindsay Share Their Smoothie Recipes

Going Grey? Think Pink!

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There is so much ironic about this post title, I don't know where to start.

Perhaps at the top.

I love to eat pink food -- cotton candy, Pink Popcorn (those stale bricks of faded red popcorn sold at carnivals and state fairs, typically lined up in the sun in front of the register), gummy hearts, cherry-frosted donuts. But I never, ever wear pink. Pink screams, or rather whispers, girly. And pink or any flower pastels transform me into a mental wall flower, a bland brand of a woman that just washes into the background until I don't even exist.

However.

As I've noted in prior posts, I'm deep in the trenches in my battle against grey hair, and losing. Badly. By ground attack, water assault and drone strikes, those greys keep advancing, destroying my dome. My poor brown follicles have surrendered and now don the drab, grey uniform of the old enemy.

It's not even a fair fight. Somehow men with grey temples look distinguished, sexy even. Women are not blessed with "going grey" as a positive older attribute, especially people like me, who work in marketing around people half my age. And truth be told, I look awful with grey hair. I just do. I'd kill to be one of the many women who look stunning with grey hair, but you can't have everything.

But wait, why not? Since when do I give up so easily? This means war.

So I stormed into Hair Candy in the Mission to see Jubilee, my hair stylist and comrade, and we plotted our attack. Our strategy involved pressing the most benign of colors, pale pink, into action to win the fight against grey. And you know what? It's winning!

Why?

• Pink plays well with the in-coming greys, so I don't have those awful days between appointments when my dark hairs just give up. Less contrast = more alluring.

• Speaking of contrasts, I do love the contrast between light pink hair and my dark eyes. I now play them up by darkening my eyebrows, and wearing a little eyeliner, which I love.

• Surprisingly, pink works well with most skin tones, and softens me up considerably. As I've gotten older and my lines and features have hardened, soft = good.

• And to that end, I've been told I look "more youthful". Which never gets old.

• My pink hair makes me feel fun, pretty, different, and more me than I think I ever have. Pink? Yeah, pink!

I'm not saying everyone should try pink, but maybe it's time to use this time of our lives to experiment with color, since our own hair is experimenting on us against our will. Lavender, light green -- hell, maybe it's time to a turn becoming a "blue haired lady" into a complement, a fashion statement, a, "hell yes, I am!"

So now that I've invited pink to my head, I'm obsessed with inviting pink into my closet, where grey holds court. Yes, while I loathe my grey hair, I do love grey apparel. Go figure.

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1: Moschino skirt, Net-A-Porter. 2: Issey Miyake pink Bao Bao Bag, Matches. 3: Wildfox pink kitten sunglasses, Bloomingdales. 4: Pink Birkenstocks, Modcloth. 5: MSGM faux fur jacket, Farfetch. 6: Vivetta oversized pink coat, Avenue 32.

For more of our style musings where we "Give Father Time the Finger", please visit us at Blank Stare, Blink.

Earlier on Huff/Post50:



Stylish Twins From Cincinnati

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Two of my friends from college (The Oylers from Cincinnati, Ohio) are always posting picture of their adorable twins (Izzy & Gabby). Of course, parents are always posting pictures of their children to their social media outlets. What really caught my attention is the stylish clothing worn by these little girls. Izzy and Gabby must be the best dressed twins in the Midwest!

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photo credit: Kristen Oyler

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photo credit: Cream-n-Cocoa-Photography

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photo credit: Cream-n-Cocoa-Photography

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photo credit: Cream-n-Cocoa-Photography

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photo credit: Kristen Oyler

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photo credit: Cream-n-Cocoa Photography

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photo credit: Kristen Oyler

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photo credit: Kristen Oyler

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photo credit: Kristen Oyler

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photo credit: Cream-n-Cocoa-Photography

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photo credit: Kristen Oyler

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photo credit: Cream-n-Cocoa-Photography

My Mom's Sari(s): Worth More Than Its Weight in Gold

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The NPR piece, "Love is Saying 'Sari'" made me reflect on my connection to the sari as well as my own experiences with potential loss and the importance of leaving a legacy.

My sister and I sit in my parent's bedroom as my mom looks through her sari(s), gently touching the fabric and examining the borders of each almost as if she is looking at a collection of dolls, elephants or other knickknacks that someone collects. She sighs about not having anywhere to wear them as she has worked two jobs...days, evenings and weekends...most of her adult life. She finally says to us, matter of fact, this is the sari I want to be buried in.

My dad calls to tell me that he is going to ask my cousin for the number to a lawyer so he and my mom can put together a will. My mother was diagnosed with late stage ovarian cancer four years ago and I feel incredibly lucky (privileged) that she has lived long enough to see me get married, finish my doctoral degree, and meet my little one. I don't want to think about losing a parent let alone end of life logistics related to what my mother will pass onto my siblings and I. My thoughts turn to the countless number of saris that she has painstakingly folded and stuffed in a number of places, in a suitcase or bureau. Stuffed so tightly, that if I pull one out, an endless rainbow of brightly colored sari(s) fall out on the floor, magenta, green, red and yellow. Each of the sari(s) tell a story...the faded off white wedding sari, the geometric patterned sari that she wore when she first came to the U.S., and the stiff Kerala sari that one of her brothers bought her.

As a Malayali, born in India but raised in the U.S., I have had an interesting relationship to the sari. In college, it was some sort of cultural badge of honor for my friends and I to know how to properly put on a sari. And if you knew different styles of draping, Gujarati, South Indian or Bengali, then you were a bonafied sari expert. The sari has also represented some sort of class equalizer. To the naked eye you would not see any clear socioeconomic distinctions between me and my friends or my mother and other aunties. You can always hide a cheap pair of shoes under the endless folds of material. And in professional or social spaces, I can always count on continual "oohs" and "ahhs" over me if I don a sari. In these moments, I reluctantly play the part of a cultural tour guide talking about bindi(s) and mendhi. The sari also has a meaning for me related to bodies and body image. I grew up seeing aunties of all sizes and shapes wearing a sari, many times proudly exposing stomach rolls and back fat.

There are many unexpected lessons I have learned from six to nine yards of cloth. As I carefully fold and put away my wedding sari and my manthrakodi in my modest NYC apartment, I think about my mom. When my mom's time comes, she will have passed along more to me than she will ever know.

The Plus Sized Thang

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There's a whole lot of fuss in the fashion world right now about this lady, Myla Dalbesio. She is Calvin Klein's new lingerie model. All the ruckus over her stems from the fact that this 27-year-old stunner is a size 10 and she's not on Calvin's plus sized campaign but in their regular sized marketing.

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Oh my god! The horror! A size 10 in her underwear on regular ads for regular girls. How could they? Call me nuts, but I think she looks crazy hot in her Underoos.

I have a whole lot of opinions when it comes to plus size versus regular size because I have a whole lot of experience. Over the course of two years, I have lost half of my body weight. I went from a size 28/30 to a 12/14 so this kind of stuff pisses me off in a way that unless you have been there, you cannot possibly comprehend.

This is a self-portrait with my friend Payton from a few years ago. (That's me there on the right)

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This is a self-portrait of me from September.

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You don't get to live in a body like that without developing some hard-core body image issues. Even with all of the work I've done to get to this size I still have a hard time. Seeing stories like this in the news doesn't help. I mean really, if someone who looks like Myla can be judged and told she's "plus sized" then there is no hope for me. What was the point of going through everything I did to get here? If she's too fat, then I'm seriously fucked.

I hate that there is even plus-sized versus regular-sized in the first place. It's one of the last acceptable forms of segregation and judgment. Yes, I said segregation. It's only been in the last couple of years that women over a size 14 were even allowed to shop with everyone else. Before that, we had to shop in our own stores.

Oh, and the choices! If you were lucky you might live in a town with one or two places to buy clothing. Mostly though you were stuck with crap you found online or you saved up for a trip to a city where you might just get lucky and find three or four places to shop.

Trick here is that even our own industry screwed us. The clothes were (and still are) exorbitantly priced when compared to regular clothing and the quality was (and still is) shit. "Fashion", for the most part is a hilarious term for plus sized clothing. Especially when you get into a size 20 or larger. It's primarily all Mumu's and knit separates. And it's all the exact same cut. I guess every woman over a size 16 must have a huge ass, be 5'5 and have enormous breasts, because that's the cut. Straight across the board.

That in itself is infuriating, because I'm tall. I've got ridiculously long, skinny, bird legs and I have no ass at all. It's flat as a pancake. Even when I was a size 28 I had no ass. I didn't wear pants for a decade because every single pair of pants in my size made me look like I was waiting on the big flood and in the meantime, had taken a shit the size of Detroit in my jeans. Not good.

All bodies are different. They are like fingerprints. We are not all built alike and it sucks that over half the population of women are stuck shopping at three or four boutique shops that only carry that same short, wide cut while there is an endless supply of stores that carry every imaginable cut and style as long as you are a 14 or smaller.

I'm lucky now because at my size, there aren't any options that are not available to me. I can shop in the regular sized stores or the plus sized ones. And it's getting better. More stores are carrying "plus-sized" sections. Target, H&M and Forever 21 are some of my favorites. They actually have some really "fashionable" things for bigger gals. And all-hail the Forever 21 skinny jean in a size 14! First pants ever that not only fit my flat ass, but actually make me look like I have a little bedonk going on back there.

But even as great as that is, it still feels really segregated. The plus sized sections are always located way in the back, in a dark corner. Completely hidden from the windows, entrance or anywhere really that shoppers might have to encounter the dreaded fat girl. And the pickins are painfully slim. There are only a few racks; so few that you can literally turn around in H&M's section and that's it. You've seen it all. This fall you have your choice of three sweaters, two pairs of leggings, one pair of jeans and a single coat. Ah yes, thank you for this vast and stunning display of colors, textures and fabrics in which to cloak my hideous body!

I digress; we are getting better. As a society we are getting better. Victoria's Secret just took a rash of backlash for it's latest campaign. There were eight rail thin models lined up on their tippy toes (Why they are on their tippy toes, I am not sure) with the words "The Perfect Body" splashed across the front of it.

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Whoa! Hang on a second. That's it. That's the perfect body. No other bodies are perfect, just the women who look like this. People got pissed about it and I get it. There were 26,000 signatures on a Change.org petition for the company to pull the ad. They complied... a little. It's the same ad, but they changed the wording to "A Body for Every Body."

But that doesn't make sense at all. It's the same girls. So now these are all the bodies? There are no other body shapes or sizes? It's still offensive if you ask me. Even smoking hot Myla doesn't stand a chance against these girls. Which means that I, in my size 14 skinny jeans am still super fucked!

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Myla and her underwear... I really do think she looks great. She doesn't look "plus sized" to me, and it breaks my heart into a million tiny pieces to think, "If there is outrage over her size 10 self, then what the hell kind of hideous monster must people think I am every time I walk out the door." It makes me feel ugly and ashamed of myself. I hate that.

I hate it because I know a whole lot of women of all sizes and shapes feel the same way. I know there is a girl out there right now who saw an article about Myla or the Victoria's Secret ad and just said, "fuck it" and ate that leftover cupcake. There is a girl out there who threw in the towel and skipped the gym. There are women who felt like I did and thought, "What's the point? I'll never be good enough." and just gave up.

But I didn't give up. I felt like shit for a minute and then I sat down and blogged all this out for you. I leashed up the dogs and took a walk. I picked out something pretty to wear tonight and I decided to do something to really piss people off.

If Myla in her lingerie ad caused such a big commotion, then I can't wait to see what the world thinks of me in mine. I'm no Myla, but I'm a real goddamned woman. And I think I look fucking great!

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Take that fashion industry! Take that Calvin Klein! Take that Victoria's Secret! Take that America! Take that shit in. Take it all in. Put me in any category you want, but you can't make me feel bad about myself any more and I beg the rest of you not to let them take you down either. I am the perfect body and so are you.

Epiblog: A place for paying it forward and supporting artists, entrepreneurs and people who inspire me. I hope you find some inspiration here too.

This weeks Epiblog is dedicated to Payton Kemp. Payton herself went from a size 14 to a size 6 over the last two years. She still struggles with the same issues we all do, but she is so body positive for women of all sizes that she is an inspiration. She works in the fashion industry as a stylist, model and wardrobe person. She is also a great blogger. You can find some inspiration from Payton at her blog "Paytons Place"
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Embracing Who You Are

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For many years I've been blessed by my friendship with Pamela Ferrell, one of the country's leading experts on natural Black hair. Pamela and her husband Taalib-Din Uqdah co-founded the Washington, D.C. hair salon Cornrows & Co. in 1980, pioneering the natural hair care movement with African-inspired braids and hairstyles. They point out that their philosophy and the natural product line they created for their styles long predated today's green movement: Cornrows & Co. has always featured a chemical-free salon with plant-based products, focusing both on protecting each client's health and using products that are locally made and safe for the earth. Today, using chemical-free products and embracing "natural beauty" have gained traction in many mainstream circles -- yet both are still sometimes considered countercultural for African Americans, especially when it comes to Black women's hair. But that tide has been slowly but surely changing, and over the years Pamela has been a leading and persistent voice championing Black women -- and girls, and boys and men -- embracing who they are.

In September 2014, Pamela was honored at the Pentagon for her admirable work. As an experienced business owner and published author, she assisted the Army's review of hairstyle policies by providing valuable information and samples of natural hairstyles before a panel of Army personnel leaders reviewing new grooming rules that had declared twists and locks unauthorized. Her presentation covered the factual differences between "circle" and "straight" hair types and the negative results that can come from policies restricting natural hairstyles made by authorities with no actual expertise on hair, "like women being forced to straighten their hair with caustic chemicals while in remote places like Iraq where running water is unpredictable." The Army ultimately revised its guidelines. Pamela gave similar testimony in 1993 when the Navy banned braids, and over the last thirty years her company initiated lawsuits against Hyatt and Marriott Hotels, American Airlines, the Smithsonian Institution security guards' supervisors, and the Washington, D.C. Metropolitan Police Department in support of allowing braided hairstyles in the workplace. She's said that she believes her role supporting "hair diversity" is to educate corporations and organizations so they can make grooming policies based on factual knowledge about hair instead of uninformed or racially-based generalizations about "bad" hairstyles. But as a hairstylist specializing in natural Black hair, Pamela has understood from the beginning that much of her work involves changing her clients' own misguided stereotypes about what their hair is "supposed" to be and do and what constitutes "good" and "bad" hair.

2014-11-14-cornrows.jpgIt's hardly secret that the straighter hairstyles once considered the main standard for professionalism -- and beauty -- for Black women often came from changing their hair's natural texture to mimic the texture of White people's hair. Ironically, as difficult as it was for natural braids and similar styles to become widely accepted for Black women, those styles have always been the standard of beauty for young Black girls. Many Black women still remember the hours they spent sitting between a mother's or grandmother's knees having their hair braided. I certainly do. The elaborate styles decorated with beads, barrettes, and bows have long showcased the creativity and love that goes into caring for Black girls' hair. But for many little Black girls, the day finally came when a bowl of lye or a straightening iron from the stove turned their rows of braids into straight ponytails or short little bobs. Abandoning styles based on their natural textures in favor of "Whiter" styles was a rite of passage on their way to Black womanhood.

With the "Black is beautiful" mantra that emerged in the 1960s, those attitudes slowly started to change. I was among many who proudly wore an "afro." Long, straight hairstyles were no longer the universal standard as more and more Black and multiracial women celebrated the individuality, creativity, beauty, and diversity of their natural God-given textures. Pamela has been at the forefront of this movement since the beginning; her book Let's Talk Hair is a classic for Black women dedicated to having healthy, natural hair, and her follow-up Kids Talk Hair, for which I had the privilege of writing the foreword, emphasized how important it is to teach all of our children to love their hair and themselves exactly as they are. But the fact that in 2014 Pamela Ferrell is still being invited to appear before authorities just to affirm that natural Black hairstyles have a right to exist shows we still have a way to go.

Today, teaching Black children that they don't have to have straight hair or look like anyone else or stop being who they are in order to be accepted is another way of reaffirming that they are already perfect exactly the way God made them. This is a critical message for Black children and parents, and at the same time it's a message every child needs to hear. It's a message about self-confidence, self-acceptance, tolerance, and celebrating difference that is much bigger than choosing a hairstyle.

20-Something Friendly Underwear

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Boys, it's time to grow up and become men. Yes that's right, it's time to graduate from the basic white brief. It's time to enter a new breed of underwear and step up your arsenal of choices.

At The Underwear Expert, we've rounded up our favorite 20 or so brands of underwear that are perfect for the 20-something year old. Infuse your underwear collection with fun prints, bold colors and superior design. Right now, we're loving Happy Socks and Muchchomalo for their playful designs. If you want color, Papi and teamm8 will brighten your life. Need something with more support? Give the newest collections from Freedom Reigns and 2(X)IST a try. These are some of the best we've seen on the market this year! Welcome to your new life. Not only will you feel the change in your confidence from wearing awesome new underwear appropriate for your age, but everyone around you will notice too.



For the rest of the story, and to shop the looks featured, head over to The Underwear Expert.

Get Kate's Style: Where To Get The Duchess' Effortless Look In Stores And Online

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Whatever Kate Middleton, the Duchess of Cambridge, wears is front-page news on websites and tabloids around the world. Whether she's casual in J Brand jeans and Le Chameau wellies, or dressed up in a Reiss dress and L.K. Bennett nude pumps, the clothes and accessories she wears flies off store shelves.

As the future Queen of England the Duchess is loyal to British brands, which are readily available in US stores, online and off. Here's a roundup of Kate's favorite British designers that you can easily shop for at home.

In addition to dressing like Kate, fans of the Duchess can also take an etiquette class, similar to the one Kate may have taken when she joined the Royal Family, at Beaumont Etiquette. The Duchess Effect class will teach you how to sit-up straight, get out of a car without revealing anything, shake hands firmly but friendly, and a few more just-like-Kate essentials.

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